Why did I watch National Security (2003)?  Because, why not?  It was short and it was on Netflix.  What more do you want?  I have a hunch that a lot of times this makes up the primary reason for the streaming choices of many people.  As such, perhaps you will read this review before you see this movie and say to yourself, “Maybe I will choose something different?  Like A Tourist’s Guide to Love?  That is also only an hour and a half and on Netflix.  I will watch that instead.”  Thus, consider this review of National Security a warning.

I was confused by the title National Security.  I thought it would have more to do with some kind of silly espionage plot.  I say “silly” because this is meant to be a comedy.  And like all such examples of this ilk, they start with a tragic death.  Officer Hank Rafferty (Steve Zahn) and his partner, Officer Charlie Reed (Timothy Busfield), respond to a faulty alarm call at a local storage unit.  They enter the premises as some kind of heist is occurring.  By the way, when has splitting up in these kinds of situations ever worked out for one of the splittees?  This is what this dynamic duo does, leading to his murder at the hands of a mysterious figure with a tattoo on his wrist.  This happens with Hank looking on, powerless to stop it.  We then switch to Earl Montgomery (Martin Lawrence).  He is a security guard trying to make his way onto the Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD).  He is a good cadet, but mouthy and unafraid to show up his instructors.  As a result, he gets kicked out of the academy.  Meanwhile, not long after Charlie’s funeral, Hank is back on patrol.  He comes upon Earl as he is trying to reach his keys that are locked inside his vehicle.  Hank takes this action as Earl trying to steal the vehicle.  The altercation becomes heated, but changes its tenor when a bee flies into the vicinity.  Earl starts panicking because he is allergic to bee stings, while Hank starts swinging his baton wildly in an attempt to kill the insect.  The exchange is caught on video by a bystander, and it appears that Hank is beating Earl.  The footage is turned into the news, and because Earl is stung, it looks as if the swelling is due to violence caused by Hank.  In response, Hank’s boss, Lieutenant Washington (Bill Duke), forces Hank to turn in his badge and gun.  Because of the community response to this incident, Hank is put on trial and ends up serving six months in jail.  Upon getting out, with no other prospects, Hank becomes a security guard for the company from which the name of the movie is derived.  Yet, he cannot let the death of his partner go unresolved.  Therefore, he spends his free time driving around the city with a citizen’s band (CB) radio tuned to police frequencies, waiting to hear something connected to the crime he witnessed.  His efforts yield a possible match when a malfunctioning alarm system comes his attention.  When he gets there, he catches the same people as the night Charlie died.  It also happens to be a warehouse for which Earl is a security guard.  It is the shooting that distracts him from his, ahem, other pursuits.  Entering the fray, Earl is just as surprised as Hank to be working together in this moment.  Unfortunately, the bad guys get away and now Earl is invested in trying to help bring to justice those responsible.  Hank wants nothing to do with Earl, but Earl is insistent.  He also proves helpful, particularly when they are brought in for questioning and Earl denies that Hank had kidnapped the man who landed him in prison.  Once they are released, Hank uses the cell phone one of the criminals dropped before to find the location of a semi-truck that is being used by those behind this conspiracy.  They manage to get into the trailer as it is going down the road.  In it, they find the van used by the criminals and drive it off a bridge.  Luckily, it lands on a garbage barge, and from there they somehow get it to Hank’s ex-girlfriend’s, Denise (Robinne Lee), house.  She had broken up with him because she is African American and believed what the news said about Hank.  Right.  Not that Earl is any help in this regard, refusing to give the real story to her because Denise is black and he does not approve of interracial relationships.  Next, Earl and Hank go to retrieve Hank’s car, but instead find police waiting for them.  Hank intervenes by stealing a cop car.  As they get away, Hank uses the computer to find out that there is a warrant out for their arrest.  This can only mean that there is somebody inside the LAPD behind this mess.  The mess, by the way, is something having to do with rare metals worth millions of dollars.  They also learn that it is Detective Frank McDuff (Colm Feore) that is the dirty police officer.  With all this information, they feel they have enough to go to Lieutenant Washington.  He tells them they do not have the evidence, so they arrange for a trap to bring all the key players into the light.  Because this also has an action element to it, this means a climactic shoot out.  In the end, Hank saves Earl from plummeting to his death.  The two are rewarded by positions on the LAPD, and they are made partners.  The final sequence sees a replay of the scenario that got Hank arrested, though this time with an actual car thief.

YAWN!  I write that to indicate my current level of exhaustion and the fact that there is nothing original about National Security.  It is a buddy cop movie, even if they are not actual cops most of the time.  Either way, the concept is the same and there are dozens like it.  What is strange about this one is how, for a film that is mainly supposed to be light-hearted, it has a lot to say about racial profiling.  This is not a good practice, and incredibly it is one once championed by law enforcement.  I would like to think times are changing in this regard, but it still seems like this mindset lingers, unfortunately.  It is not one that has ever been an official stance of the Catholic Church.  The Church in the United States has not always been perfect in this regard, but its record is a lot better than other institutions in this country.  Those who have repeated this kind of nonsense have not been following doctrines of the Faith.  Whether you are talking about mistakes made by the Church or the government, I find that the easiest way to avoid giving in to such impulses is to first identify them, and then do the opposite.  Anything that is done purely because somebody is of a different skin color is, by definition, racism.  You can use any kind of mental gymnastics you like to argue against, but that is all equivocation.  It is best to call it as it is, racism, and learn from it.  Earl and Hank have their own defects in this regard as was discussed in the previous paragraph, and we can learn from it.

You can learn better, though, by not watch National Security.  Try reading a book.  Or watch a better movie.  It is unfunny, predictable, and full of a lot of nonsensical action schlock in between.  Consider yourself warned.