Would you believe a movie called Unicorn Store (2017) is good?  Then again, if you are as into the mythical creatures in the title as the main character Kit (Brie Larson), you probably would accept such a notion.  You would also have a bit of a misconception as to the content of the film.  You would not be alone.  I almost scrolled past it on Netflix.  I cannot tell you what made me return to it and sit through the preview.  I have had a long day and I am pretty tired, so you will have to bear with me.  Nonetheless, after I viewed the trailer, I knew this Catholic reviewer could not pass on this movie.  Hopefully you will see why from reading this article.

I am sure that young Kit (Leila Peironi) wished that there was such a thing as a Unicorn Store.  What the first few minutes do for us is establish a love of unicorns that does not seem to fade when she reaches adulthood.  As a grown-up, she is essentially shamed out of art school for putting her passion for the horned horses into her work.  Her professor (Matt Luem) is not impressed with the rainbow patterns and glitter.  Instead, Kit returns to her parents, Gene (Bradley Whitford) and Gladys (Joan Cusack), and spends a day moping in front of the television.  When Gene and Gladys return from their job as counselors at Emotion Quest, a company that specializes in helping troubled youth, they attempt to cheer their daughter.  As part of the therapy they try, much to Kit’s annoyance, they bring home Kevin (Karan Soni).  He also works at Emotion Quest, and Gene and Gladys hope he can help their daughter.  It only makes Kit madder.  Thus, at dinner, upon downing a healthy pour of wine, she announces that she is going to take employment with a temp agency called Temporary Success.  These jokes land better when you are watching the movie.  The task she is given is befitting of somebody of her position: making an endless number of copies.  Regardless, she draws the attention of the company’s vice president, Gary (Hamish Linklater).  Some of this comes in the form of light sexual harassment, though he is also intrigued by her stated art skills.  As such, he begins enticing her with the promise of more permanent employment.  Yet, as Kit is just settling into her position, she finally gets one of the invitations you see being left for her in odd places.  It claims to be from something called “The Store,” where they sell everything you need and want.  Not quite understanding this message but intrigued all the same, she goes to the correct address and enters the premises.  After a number of doors and passageways, she finally comes to the Salesman (Samuel L. Jackson).  He looks crazy, and to finish off the creepiness, seems to know everything about her.  It is his pitch that calms her down, especially when he asks what it is that she really wants.  When she says she cannot name it, he brings her to her lifelong love of unicorns.  He then says that he can get her a living, breathing one, and goes on to name a bunch of attributes about them and requirements for owning them.  Kit gets these in writing and sets to work.  The first is to build a suitable home for the magical creature.  For this, she goes to the local hardware store and enlists the help of Virgil (Mamoudou Athie).  He is no handyman, but rather the guy that cleans the floors, yet Kit’s enthusiasm convinces him to lend a hand.  This is also when the Salesman tells her that she must have a happy home, which means that she must deal with Gene and Gladys.  To this end, she goes on one of their Emotion Quest retreats.  During one of the sharing circles, she confronts them about her feeling like she is an embarrassment to them.  It does not go well, but she chalks it up as a victory because at least she spoke her mind.  The next task is to have a suitable income to support the outlandish dietary restrictions of owning a unicorn.  This seems to be coming from Gary.  Thinking that giving Kit a chance will lead to a romantic involvement, he allows her to come up with a pitch for how to market the vacuum cleaners for which their company has been tasked to come up with an advertising campaign.  By now, with just enough regular reminders from the Salesman about the impending unicorn ownership, Kit is reliving her childhood.  Her presentation involves a colorful, multi-layered, and ruffled outfit, lots of glitter, every color under the sun, and plenty of theatrics on her part.  They instead go with the simple picture of a sexy lady with a baby, and Kit is asked to leave.  Undaunted, she later reveals to Virgil the deal she has with the Salesman, including admitting that a real unicorn is involved.  To his credit, he goes with her to The Store, but finds it deserted and the Salesman nowhere to be found.  Rather than telling her that she is crazy, Virgil attempts to make Kit realize that she had been swindled.  She responds by leaving angrily.  She then goes home and starts clearing out of her life everything unicorn related.  A heart-to-heart with Gladys, and Virgil coming to finish the stable and fill it with her art, calms Kit.  However, just as it appears that she is ready to move on, she gets a call from the Salesman telling her that her unicorn is ready to take home.  With everything she had been through, including doubting what she had seen, she goes over Virgil’s objections, spurred by the Salesman telling her that another woman is interested.  Remarkably, the mythical beast is at The Store just as the Salesman promised.  She goes into the rainbow saturated room in which the unicorn is waiting, and with Virgil eventually arriving, has a chance to say goodbye to the creature.  She has decided to let the other woman have it, whom Kit and Virgil see on the way out.  The end.

As I hinted at in the introduction, Unicorn Store is not really about whether the title beasts are real.  Of course, they are not, and I have seen some funny popular culture attempts at explaining this phenomenon.  Actually, there are a lot of phenomena to explain here from a Catholic perspective, something for which I was not prepared.  There are themes of loving yourself and understanding your self-worth, and being the person that God created you to be.  Kit must also come to terms with moving on, something for which the unicorn is a metaphor.  Check out 1 Corinthians 13 for a Biblical reference to this notion, and one I have covered in other reviews.  Instead, I would like to focus on an exchange Kit has with a different hardware store employee when she tries to describe what she needs for her prospective unicorn without actually saying the word.  Based on what she says, the employee thinks she is talking about Jesus.  This brings Kit up short, with her concluding that who are we to say what is real in the mind of a true believer.  Such phrases are only logical in the mind of a non-believer, albeit, perhaps, one that is at least willing to live and let live.  There are many problems with this idea.  The first is the easiest.  We can prove that Jesus was (and is) real, whereas there has never been a shred of proof for the existence of unicorns.  Put differently, God made man is not a construct of the mind, but a physical reality, and a spiritual one.  This is further muddied in the film because Kit’s encounter with the unicorn does everything Jesus can also do, and in a much more tangible way.  More broadly, thinking about Jesus as being whatever we want Him to be, whether this is a unicorn or a flying spaghetti monster, is borderline blasphemy.  It is us constructing God, when it is God that created us.  

I should be more adapted by now to movies like Unicorn Store.  It is an example of one of those movies that says all the right things, but puts it in all the wrong packaging.  Specifically, it introduces a sort of anything goes mentality that, despite its intent, has done more damage to culture and society than anyone is willing to admit.  Catholicism is plenty accepting of everyone, no matter who you are, though there are certain rules.  More importantly, a film like this talks about how people fit in with society but gives little direction for doing so.  This is something only God can truly provide.