My first job was bagging groceries at Albertson’s.  If you are thinking of making jokes about this place of employment and my name, rest assured, they have already been said.  At any rate, I stayed with the company for five years.  By the end of it, I had ascended (if that is the correct word) to behind the counter in the front of the store where various non-food items were sold.  Among my duties was renting out movies.  Our store had a small room full of films, all of them video home system (VHS) tapes.  Did you know that is what VHS stood for?  I digress.  One of the titles I recall that never seemed to get taken out to be viewed was American Ninja (1985).  There it sat in the action section, Private Joe Armstrong (Michael Dudikoff) crossing swords with an enemy warrior, but otherwise collecting dust.  I recognized this cover art this evening while scrolling through titles on the Roku channel.  Reading this review will hopefully reveal why it was left on the shelf.

You do not know Joe is an American Ninja from the opening scene.  It is on an army base in the Philippines, and he is off to the side minding his own business.  As he stands there casually playing with a folding knife, out comes Colonel William T. Hickock’s (Guich Koock) daughter, Patricia Hickock (Judie Aronson).  She needs an escort of soldiers for her planned trip to the airport, and Joe is driving one of the troop transports.  We see why the contingent is necessary when they are ambushed by rebels while enroute to the airport.  It is time for Joe to put his martial arts skills to work, particularly when a group of ninjas working with their assailants enters the fray.  He manages to save Judie and together they evade capture.  Despite his heroics, nobody is pleased with him, except Judie, who has fallen in love with hi . . . s pectoral muscles.  They share such a moment while on the run, and this changes her mind about him.  Everyone else, though, treats Joe like he has caused a severe incident by fighting back against the rebels.  Colonel Hickock confines Joe to the base pending an investigation and possible courts martial.  The rank-and-file men, led by Corporal Curtis Jackson (Steve James), are mad because Joe’s actions led to the death of their comrades.  Meanwhile, nobody seems to care that the rebels continue to act with impunity.  They do have some assistance.  Their leader, Victor Ortega (Don Stewart), employs a small army of ninjas as taught by the deadly Black Star Ninja (Tadashi Yamashita).  These were the ones that helped with the convoy attack.  However, Victor’s greatest source of assistance is the United States Army.  Victor’s main contact is Sergeant Rinaldo (John LaMotta), who arranges for weapons to be delivered to them.  Victor decides that Joe is a potential menace to his operations and wants the new recruit dealt with in some manner.  As this proceeds, we learn that Colonel Hickock is in on Sergeant Rinaldo’s dirty deeds.  Together, they pull Joe’s file and discover that the young man has a checkered past.  He had been found adrift at sea with no recollection of who he is, but with obvious abilities.  He used those to fight growing up, landing him in reform school.  When it got worse, he was given the choice of joining the army or going to jail.  This is all used as leverage against Joe.  Meanwhile, he wins the respect of his fellow soldiers by defeating Corporal Jackson in a sparring match.  One moment Corporal Jackson hates Joe, the next they are best buddies.  All the same, Joe is sent on a mission to deliver a truck full of supplies to a warehouse, which turns out to be a trap.  Being the fighter that he is, he is able to turn the tables on his attackers and find the location of the rebel compound.  He also sees some of the sophisticated equipment they have accumulated.  Of course, he makes it back to his own base, but his warnings go unheeded.  What Corporal Jackson does, though, is help set Joe up on a date with Judie.  While out, Joe spots Sergeant Rinaldo at dinner with Victor, and the latter of which has had the final straw with the upstart American. Victor demands more immediate action, and Sergeant Rinaldo has Joe arrested.  While confined, the Black Star Ninja slips into the base with the intention of murdering Joe.  As for Joe, he manages to escape confinement by holding his own against his enemy, along with some assistance from Corporal Jackson.  Somehow, this involves Patricia, and together they go to Colonel Hickock.  This is when they find out about Colonel Hickock’s treason when the commanding officer says he believes them while simultaneously calling the military police (MP), laying the blame the recent deaths with Joe.  Our hero manages to get away once more, taking it upon himself to go after Victor.  Before he can make his move, though, he is accosted by Shinyuki (John Fujioka).  He is Victor’s gardener, but also the former Japanese soldier that taught Joe ninja skills as a boy.  He conveniently has everything he needs to defeat Victor and the Black Star Ninja.  We get to the final action set-piece, with Colonel Hickock seemingly dying trying to save his kidnapped daughter from Victor.  The person who eventually performs the rescue, of course, is Joe, after defeating Back Star Ninja.  Roll credits.

There is not much good about American Ninja, though I was at least relieved that there was no nudity.  The violence is what earns it an R rating.  What is also over-the-top is the acting.  If all the roles are overplayed, it is balanced by Joe’s extreme lack of emotion.  I do not recall his face changing its demeanor once throughout all the proceedings no matter what is happening on screen.  I guess one could attribute his behavior to bushido, and this is where I shall bring in my Catholic analysis.  In short, bushido is the warrior code of the Japanese samurai.  I did not know that this also applies to ninjas.  I suspect it does not, and that the makers of the film did not bother looking up this fact.  What interests me is that it is a code.  Male and female religious in the Church, and some lay orders, have what is referred to as a “Rule of Life.”  Like bushido, it is a written as a way of guiding all manner of behavior.  It is strange to me how such a lifestyle as set in the Rule of St. Benedict, as it is alternatively known, can be seen as much of a restrictive of a code behavior as bushido.  To me, it is all part of the general silliness of the movie, that had me laughing several places where mirth is not intended.

Another funny aspect of American Ninja is its production company, Cannon Films.  During the 1980s and 1990s, they produced what can, at their very best, be described as action schlock movies.  This one falls neatly into that category.  My favorite part comes when, after a slow car chase, Joe runs Sergeant Rinaldo into a tree.  Upon impact, the jeep immediately explodes.  Yes, it is one of those movies.