Despite some genuine moments of heart in its predecessor, I knew there was a reason I avoided Hot Tub Time Machine 2 (2015).  It is not just because they replaced John Cusack in the sequel.  The minimal research I did on the matter came back with one of the simplest, and silliest, answers as to why this happened: they did not want to spend the money to bring back Cusack.  Perhaps I am a little biased since, like me, he is a Chicago native.  Nonetheless, it is indicative of a systemic problem with the movie overall, that being that it stinks.  It seems they figured this was the case while it was in development.  As this became more widely known, investors began pulling out, and bringing everyone back became too expensive.  Yet, like the awful decisions made by the main characters in the movie, they went ahead with shooting it anyway.  From what I can tell, there is not much love at all for this flick.  Read on, if you dare, to find out whether I can take anything positive from it.

Whether we want to or not, Hot Tub Time Machine 2 picks up a few years after its predecessor, looking in on the lives of three of the original characters.  Where is John Cusack’s Adam Yates?  Nick Webber (Craig Robinson) tells us during an interview of the famous musician and producer that Adam, after writing a book based on their time traveling adventures, is out there somewhere “finding himself.”  Right.  Of course, none of this would be possible without the reality altering deeds of the self-destructive jerk Lou “Vialator” Dorchen (Rob Corddry).  He had stayed behind in the past and made himself billions, inventing, among other things “Lougle.”  Yes, it is exactly what you think.  A fourth person from before is his erstwhile son Jacon Dorchen (Clark Duke).  In the present, it looks like the Dorchen empire is beginning to fade.  Nick’s music is beginning to go out of style, and Lou is running out of ideas to steal from the past to make his own.  At a meeting of Lougle executives where they tell him the bad news, Lou attempts to turn things around by saying he has invented time travel.  His technology guru, Brad (Kumail Nanjiani), angrily storms out of the meeting and says he is going to the lab.  Lou cannot be bothered, however, and invites everyone to a party he is hosting that night.  As he delivers a speech to his guests, somebody in the crowd produces a gun and shoots him in his manhood, the lights flickering at the precise moment for dramatic effect.  Jacob and Nick rush to his side, and Jacob’s bright idea is to take Lou, who they believe is dying, into a secret room behind the staircase.  Inside, Lou has brought the jacuzzi from their previous time travel, along with the substance they need in order to complete the process.  They dump a weakened Lou into the tub and proceed to get wasted, thinking they can go back to the time before the assault and prevent it.  When they come to, they have time traveled, but instead ten years into the future.  Their vague guide from the last film, the Repairman (Chevy Chase), materializes out of thin air.  As before, he spouts some rough philosophy about being when and where they are supposed to be, before disappearing again, not to be heard from for the rest of the movie.  Without any guidance whatsoever, Jacob, Lou, and Nick head out to try to uncover the identity of Lou’s supposed killer.  In a twist on the previous premise, Jacob is the rich one with a hot wife in the future, while Lou should not exist, hence his periodic flickering.  This condition gives only the minimal of boosts as they follow their first lead.  When Jacob finds Adam’s jacket near the tub, they conclude it to mean it is their old friend who wants Lou dead.  This takes them to the home of Adam Yates . . . Stedmeyer Jr. (Adam Scott).  He is as square as they come, and about to be married to Jill (Gillian Jacobs).  Because he had never had a real bachelor party, she sends him out with the other three because, you know, you have to have four . . . just because.  From here, it devolves into what amounts to a fetch quest as they eliminate a series of potential suspects.  In the process, Adam Jr. has a crazy night, taking drugs and making out with a bunch of women who are not his bride-to-be.  None of this sounds like typical behavior for him, but Jill is shocked all the same.  At the same time, Lou’s behavior is his usual cavalier manner, caring less about his impending demise and more about having a good time.  After a series of misadventures, they come to Adam Jr.’s wedding.  Remember Brad and his declaration of going to the lab?  It turned out to be to invent the substance needed to make time travel possible.  He also conveniently happens to be a friend of Adam Jr. and thus in attendance at the nuptials.  Though Lou is supposed to be finding Brad in order to return to his own time, he ends up having sex with an angry and drunk Jill, and Adam Jr. finds them in the compromising position.  In response, he takes the sought after substance from Brad and goes back to the time period the other three just left in order to murder Lou.  They think this means the end until Jacob realizes this act means there is more of the fuel in the hot tub room, which they use to talk down Adam Jr. in the present.  The final bit is some dumb colonial version of Lou murdering modern Lou, and the rest of them using the machine to be movers and shakers behind history, this last bit being handled in post-credits scenes.

When you have a film like Hot Tub Time Machine 2, I find it best that they try not to tackle issues far above its capacity for lucid thoughts.  The last one managed this to a certain degree without being heavy-handed.  In this one, they launch into a full-on exploration of the notion of predestination.  Believe it or not, this has been a topic of debate for centuries among Christians.  Did those making the movie think about these issues when they made it?  I could be wrong, but I am willing to bet that the history of Christianity was not on their minds in the slightest.  For them, there is dumb conversation pertaining to the substance they need to time travel and how they were always meant to have brought it into fruition. Whatever.  In relation to faith, it has to do with your ultimate fate.  To be clearer, I am talking about Heaven.  There were certain Protestant sects that thought that God had only a certain number of people in mind who would spend eternity with Him.  To be fair, the Bible does state a pretty precise number.  What those who subscribed to this tenet did not take into account is the fact that such numbers were meant to be taken figuratively.  In a larger sense, what this also ignores, as does the movie, is the fact that we do not truly know what will happen to us in the future.  As I stated in the last review, people like time travel films because of the knowledge that it can bring them.  It is fantasy, thankfully.  God is real.

What I worry about with movies like Hot Tub Time Machine 2, and its forerunner, is that the people take the fantasy that is attainable in the movie and pursue it.  The kind of debauchery and partying that you see in them is obnoxious, but, sadly, it attracts some.  Take all this as a warning not to see either of these films.