Since Live and Let Die (1973) was halfway decent, I had hopes that The Man with the Golden Gun (1974), Roger Moore’s second film as the famous military intelligence, section six (MI6) agent, James Bond, would be at least its equal.  I suppose this is true.  I spent most of it thinking that it was fine, if your standard 007 stuff.  Yet, periodically throughout its runtime, there are moments that are so preposterous that I am laughing when that is likely not the intended reaction for a given scene.  For example, during the main car chase sequence, James, incredibly accompanied by Louisiana State Policemen J. W. Pepper (Clifton James) from the previous film, jumps a canal in his vehicle.  I am severely underplaying the incredibility of this sequence.  I will just add here that as the car flies through the air, it corkscrews with a Looney Tunes-esque sound effect to go with it.  This is just one instance of a few others that have to be seen to believed, or not believed, really.  This is not an endorsement, by the way.  You could just rely on this review for the rest.

On a deserted island in the South China Sea, a man dressed as a gangster has come to face The Man with the Golden Gun.  The title character is Francisco Scaramanga (Christopher Lee), and he literally has the item mentioned.  He uses it as a contract killer, his services being peddled to a select clientele, namely those who can pay him $1 million per contract.  Apparently, he is getting bored with his high-priced assassinations for his man servant, Nick Nack (Hervé Villechaize), brings the organized crime figure into a secret lair where Francisco hunts the gunman.  While doing so, Francisco imagines that he is shooting at James Bond, complete with a lifelike figure of the British secret agent.  Speaking of James, he is called in from his usual pursuit of pleasures of the flesh to be taken off his current mission of finding a scientist named Gibson (Gordon Everett).  Gibson has a revolutionary new solar energy device, but he has gone missing. While that seems important, the golden bullet marked with “007” that comes to MI6 headquarters is more pressing in the eyes of the organization’s chief, M (Bernard Lee).  M does not want his best operative with a price on his head, so he orders James to take a leave of absence.  Instead, James declares that he will find this mysterious killer first.  To do so, he first heads to Beirut, Lebanon, where another agent had been killed by means of a similar weapon.  He manages to find the bullet that did the job, and brings it back to Q (Desmond Llewlyn), the inventor of all his gadgets, for analysis.  The information gathered from this leads him to Macau, China, to a specialty gun maker named Lazar (Marne Maitland).  From the gunsmith, James finally has his name, and where he is supposed to give the bullets to Francisco.  Following this lead brings James to Andrea Anders (Maud Adams), Francisco’s messenger and carrier of his deadly cargo, in Hong Kong.  James manages to convince her to help bring him to Francisco, but instead James witnesses the assassin murder Gibson.  The Hong Kong police immediately arrest James, though the main officer, Lieutenant Hip (Soon-Taik Oh), turns out to be working with MI6.  Suddenly, James is brought to M at a secret base aboard the wreck of the Queen Elizabeth in the bay.  M is taking a closer interest in James’ progress, and orders 007 to take on the wide-eyed Mary Goodnight (Britt Ekland) as a partner.  Together, along with Lieutenant Hip, they travel to Bangkok where they plan to meet with Hai Fat (Richard Loo), a corrupt Chinese business man who is Francisco’s main employer.  It is also to Hai Fat that they have traced the solex agitator, the device that disappeared from Gibson’s person.  James shows up at Hai Fat’s compound masquerading as Francisco, but since the genuine article is already present, they see through the ruse.  In classic Bond villain fashion, instead of killing the English spy, they send him to a martial arts school. . . ?  I am as puzzled as you are, but I am simply relaying the facts.  Miraculously, Lieutenant Hip and his two nieces happen by to help James escape, but then they drive away without taking James. . . ?  Again, I am only telling you what occurs.  Whatever the case, this sets up the boat/car chase when State Trooper Pepper is on hand because he is on vacation in Thailand with his wife.  Right.  This is when Francisco decides to directly intervene, using Andrea’s desire to get away from his clutches to set up a meeting with James.  She dies in the process, but James makes off with the solex agitator.  Or, at least, he nearly does, because it comes into Mary’s possession, who proceeds to climb into Francisco’s trunk while in the process of tailing the villain. Luckily, her homing device is detected, bringing James to Francisco’s private island.  After pleasantries are exchanged between the adversaries, including the typical revealing of Francisco’s ultimate plot to use solar energy to rule the world, he and James stand back-to-back, about to have an old-fashioned duel.  However, Francisco decides to do a repeat of the scene we saw towards the beginning of the film.  The tables are turned against the assassin, though, when James accidentally drops his gun.  This leads to Francisco being distracted, giving James the opportunity to slip into the place of his lookalike and kill Francisco.  James then retrieves the solex agitator, but not before Mary inadvertently sets in motion the destruction of the island . . . with her butt.  They are able to escape on Francisco’s junk, but have to take care of Nick Nack before they can relax under the covers.

That last scene in The Man with the Golden Gun might not sound out of the ordinary, except for the fact that Nick Nack is a little person.  Yes, the famous British spy has a fight with a little person.  It is not a pivotal moment in cinematic history, and is as cartoonish as the rest of the so-called comedic relief.  In other words, it is not flattering.  What is a little more serious, though barely so, is the way the movie treats the concept of service.  I put the caveat on that statement because James looks at climbing into bed with every woman he encounters as part of his duty to queen and country.  Indeed, this is how he seems to solve most of his problems.  Duty, though, is an interesting word from a Catholic perspective.  Most of the time, particularly from those outside the Church, it is looked upon as a burden.  People do not like to be told what to do, even if it is leading them to Heaven.  For those that do, especially priests or those in religious orders, performing tasks directed by God is no more burdensome than some of what you see James Bond doing, albeit of a completely different nature.  I cannot stress enough that last point!  The silliness of such comparisons aside, the movie does underscore the proper perspective when it comes to service in the contrast between Francisco and James.  The former enjoys killing, whereas the latter does it in order to cater to a higher calling.  Francisco attempts to goad James into admitting that the spy enjoys seeing others die at the end of his Walther PPK.  James remains unmoved.  While I hope none of us are put to such destructive ends, we can at least admire the dedication these ideas evoke.

This is about the best a Catholic like me can say about The Man with the Golden Gun.  If there were not so many goofy parts, it might be a little more tolerable.  I am not sure if this is Roger Moore’s fault, but the final product is plainly played for too many laughs.  Luckily, you can ignore all this by not watching it.