During the coursework phase of my Ph.D. studies at Loyola University Chicago, I had a course on Atlantic History.  To be clear, it was not the study of the ocean’s past, but rather a look at the early modern period (roughly 1500-1800) when global trade was beginning to emerge.  Unfortunately, one of the byproducts of this emergence was the Trans-Atlantic Slave Trade.  One of the books we read during the semester focused on this horrible period in our collective past.  While discussing this study, a classmate of mine spoke up, pointing out what he thought was obvious: that we were all forgetting the slaves we carry around inside our stomachs.  When the rest of us were confused as to what he was talking about, he clarified that he was referring to the meat that many of us had likely consumed at some point during that day.  He is, of course, entitled to his vegan beliefs, but it went further.  He considered owning pets to be slavery.  I bring up this anecdote because, oddly enough, it relates to Conquest of the Planet of the Apes (1972), a movie that disabused me of the notion that the modern series has anything to do with the originals.  And if ever there was an understatement, it is that last sentence . . . not so much the thoughts of my former colleague, God be with him.

It is now 1991 on Earth, and it is just before the Conquest of the Planet of the Apes.  Twenty years previously, our third rock from the sun was visited by two apes from its future.  Before they were murdered for supposedly being the harbingers of doom of a simian dominated planet, they gave birth to a son who will eventually be named Caesar (Roddy McDowall).  He had been raised in the circus by its ring leader, Armando (Ricardo Montalbán).  Now that traveling band of performers is coming to a city . . . somewhere.  I do not know if I would call it the United States.  They all speak English, but the governor of this city, for lack of a better word, Breck (Don Murray), refers to a “former” president.  Hence, I guess the country has been replaced by a militaristic, fascist regime, at least based on the gestapo like uniforms of authority figures.  The government is not the only thing that has changed.  A disease at some point in the intervening years has killed all the pets of the world.  To replace them, humans turned to apes.  Somewhere along the line, they realized that these chimpanzees and gorillas could be trained.  Now, instead of simply being household companions, apes are brutally enslaved.  What could go wrong?  Well, this is the world that Armando had been trying to keep Caesar from for all these years, but he (as all circus performers do, of course) arrives in a helicopter in the city with the only talking monkey in the world on a leash.  Armando at least has the sense to know that such an ability would cause a stir, to say the least, so he has Armando keep quiet.  Remember when I mused about what could go wrong?  Well, Caesar sees a group of his kind being arbitrarily beaten by the police and can no longer hold back his disgust, crying out against the humiliation. The officers look for the culprit and Armando attempts to take the blame, but the authorities do not believe him.  Instead, he and Caesar try to escape, but they do not get far before Armando realizes he will have to turn himself in to their hunters.  Armando tells Caesar to go and try to fit in with other apes, and that he will come for Caesar once he clears up this misunderstanding.  Instead, Armando is brought before Governor Breck, whose hyper-vigilance of their simian chattel leads him to suspect that an ape like Caesar is still alive.  Armando denies it, but is held in custody on suspicion of having given asylum to a potential threat to human civilization.  As Armando is questioned, Caesar is being trained to be a servant along with hundreds of other apes.  He remains silent as they show him how to do a number of menial tasks, things he understands perfectly well thanks to his upbringing.  His aptitude brings him some notice, and soon he is put on an auction block to be sold to the highest bidder.  That turns out to be Governor Breck, who suspects that Caesar might be the chimpanzee for whom he is looking.  Though Caesar is able to keep up the charade for a little while longer, Armando is pushed to the breaking point in revealing the truth.  Instead of talking, Armando opts to throw himself out of an office window to his death.  This is the last line to be crossed for Caesar, who begins organizing a revolution to free all apes.  Unfortunately, his efforts are discovered and he is tortured with Governor Breck personally overseeing it.  During the session, Caesar finally speaks, begging for mercy.  Instead of relenting, Governor Breck orders Caesar’s immediate execution.  Fortunately for Caesar, Governor Breck’s assistant, MacDonald (Hari Rhodes), is the only clear-minded human left in the world, and MacDonald saves Caesar from death.  This allows Caesar to revert to his planned coup, which he commences once they have gathered enough makeshift weapons.  Once this is done, he moves on to the so-called “Apes Management” building where his kind are conditioned for servitude.  With sufficient numbers, unrest begins to break out all over the city.  Governor Breck commands the wanton slaughter of all simians, but the guards are overwhelmed.  The apes slowly make their way into the command post and capture Governor Breck and MacDonald.  MacDonald is given his freedom, but Governor Breck is about to be killed on sight.  In the closing minutes of the film, Caesar launches into a soliloquy about how it is the apes’ world now, and humans will be the lesser species.

I get what Conquest of the Planet of the Apes is trying to do, and it is something that its predecessors spoke to as well.  To put a fine point on it, it is that people stink.  Indeed, when finally confronted, Governor Breck talks about humans descending from apes, and the reason they need to be beaten into submission is because it is about exercising dominance over the animal nature in all of us.  This is absurd.  Again, it is not so much the evolutionary aspect.  For the umpteenth time, Catholicism is not opposed to evolution, though when it comes to humans, there are some caveats.  Interestingly, God seems to be a part of the new ape belief system in the film, something hinted at in the previous installments.  Like the notion of our wild ape natures, little of what is said is Biblically sound.  However, let us suppose for the sake of argument that Governor Breck is right about our natures.  After all, we are fallen, and sin reigns in the world.  I doubt anyone would disagree with that statement, regardless of your religious beliefs.  The key to transcending that part of ourselves that is prone to actions contrary to God’s will is not by imposing our will on others.  This what makes MacDonald a heroic character.  He observes the inhumanity of both sides, the humans and, later, the apes, and has the courage to point it out, eventually.  The same sort of actions he is decrying happen in society today.  Christians and non-Christians alike seem more concerned about being correct than doing what God told us to do in the first place.  As it says Luke 10:27, you shall love God before all else.  That means submitting to His will rather than having others submit to yours.  Caesar does come down a little from his megalomaniacal rant at the end, saying that the new lesser creatures, the humans, need to be treated with compassion.  I am not sure he means it, and I wonder how many of us truly understand it from God’s perspective?

One of the nice things about having a blog like The Legionnaire is that it gives me the opportunity to wax poetic about a bunch of nonsense like Conquest of the Planet of the Apes.  Not much of what is in it makes any sense, hence the “nonsense” label.  I had been watching these to see how they relate to the modern one, and it turns out that the new ones are remakes.  I will finish the series, but now you know this fact, they need not be watched.