Discerning our path in life is difficult.  This is the case for me, anyway.  Some of my earliest hopes and dreams involved me getting married and having a family.  When it did not happen at the time I thought it would, I began to question whether this is right for me.  Family and friends have told me the usual things, like not yet meeting the person God has in store for me.  But does He mean for me to pursue the vocation of marriage?  I still do not know.  One thing I need to do is to stop comparing my situation to others.  Doing so only makes me feel like I am making the wrong decisions, and that is not Godly.  I tend to think that I have a duty to conform myself to what others expect of me, which also is not Godly.  At the same time, it strikes me that those among my peers who have heard God’s calling and are pursuing it have something I lack.  Once more, not Godly.  This is my particular set of circumstances, and it why I connected to Johnny Case (Cary Grant) in Holiday (1938).

Appropriately enough, Johnny is returning from a Holiday as the film opens.  He makes a brief stop to visit his close friends, and people with whom he once lived, Professor Nick (Edward Everett Horton) and Susan Potter (Jean Dixon).  Though he protests that he does not have the time to stay, he does let slip that he has found the one he wants to marry, Julia Seton (Doris Nolan).  She is the reason he cannot stay long.  Yet, when he arrives at the vast Manhattan mansion attached to the address he had been given, he can hardly believe he is in the right place.  Once he finally locates her in the cavernous surroundings, he is also momentarily introduced to her brother, Edward “Ned” Seton Jr. (Lew Ayres), as he is on the way to church.  The sibling to which he is more properly acquainted is Julia’s sister, Linda Seton (Katharine Hepburn).  She is ecstatic about their coming engagement, but understands that their father, Edward Seton Sr. (Henry Kolker), will be more difficult to convince.  As such, Linda agrees with her younger sister’s plan that Julia informs dad about her engagement during the service when he will be less inclined to talk.  While Julia does just that, Linda stays behind with Johnny.  What becomes immediately apparent is that, unlike her sibling, Linda does not care about their family’s riches.  Indeed, she prefers to spend most of her time in the homeliest, most functional room in the vast house.  During their interaction, Johnny lays out all his hopes and dreams for him and Julia, parts of which also buck convention.  Specifically, he wants some time with his bride-to-be away from work, having labored since he was a child, in order to find himself while he is still young.  Linda is awed by Johnny’s aspirations, and is enthusiastic for Julia to be wedded to him.  Indeed, she hopes to throw a party for her to announce the upcoming nuptials.  The only other hurdle is dad.  When everyone returns from church, which I am guessing is not a Catholic Mass (though Christmas-time), Johnny is direct with his intentions with Edward Sr.’s youngest daughter, including his qualifications as a man of business.  Though dad remains non-committal for the moment, later that night Julia’s entreaties convince him that Johnny is the one for her.  They plan a New Year’s Eve soiree to include the unveiling of the couple-to-be, brushing aside Linda’s ideas as to how it should be done.  As a result, during the party Linda spends her time in her favorite room upstairs, refusing to come down.  It is a society event, too, which puts the Potters, some of Johnny’s few guests, ill at ease.  As such, they end up finding Linda and having their own ado, particularly when the often drunk Ned joins them.  Eventually, Julia prevails upon Johnny to attempt to convince Linda to join the rest.  Instead, when he finds the Potters having a grand time with Linda, he tarries on the fourth floor.  Eventually, Edward Sr. and Julia come up to find the little band making merry.  On top of this distressing scene, Johnny informs Julia and her father that instead of immediately going to work for Edward Sr., Johnny would rather take some time to travel and do some self-exploration.  This development shocks Edward Sr. and Julia, and is apparently brushed off so that their engagement can be officially announced.  Before this happens, though, Johnny and Linda share a moment looking out at the revelers singing “Auld Lang Syne,” thinking about how they each feel trapped.  Following the breaking of the news, Johnny leaves the festivities, and it is Linda who goes searching for him.  She is still looking for him some time later, going to see if he is with the Potters.  They inform her that he is set to sail with them to France, and that he has gone to convince Julia to join him.  His would-be fiancée is not concerned by the fact that they have not seen one another since the party, despite Linda’s pleadings that Julia takes him seriously.  It is not long thereafter that Johnny arrives.  He is set to give up his idle dreaming if Edward Sr. would agree to him quitting after a couple years to make a go off his desires.  This is deemed acceptable, and immediately Edward Sr. sets to work making preparations for the young couple.  As their future house and how many servants they will employ is discussed, it becomes too much for Johnny.  He asserts that all the trappings of wealth will tie them down, leading to a lifetime of tedium he would rather avoid.  This is exactly what Linda had been waiting to hear, confirmed when Julia dispassionately lets him walk out the door.  Instead, she leaves her family behind to join him and the Potters on the boat.

You can see why, on a number of levels, that Johnny would consider giving up his dreams to be with Julia in Holiday. Though there is no limit to the love God has for us, what we have for one another is a littler trickier.  There are plenty of clichés out there about holding onto it once you find it, and other like phrases.  There is also something to be said about having dedication to another person, even if it is not reciprocated, even if those sentiments go unreturned.  As long as one does not become obsessive, there is nothing wrong with loving someone under any circumstance.  Such sentiments are noble and selfless, all of which are archetypes for how Jesus feels about each of us.  The problem for Johnny, and me, is how do you know when to be selfless, or to be selfish in a matter to which God is calling you?  Prayer, of course, is the answer, and having patience with how, what, and when God reveals His plan for you.  It could be prompt, or take years like me, but it will happen.  This underscores one of the problems with this and many other modern movies.  Johnny had asked Julia to marry him after only knowing each other for ten days.  The shortness of this period is questioned by the Potters.  Johnny does not what to listen to their sage advice.  Neither do the Potters, apparently, when later on they approve of Linda for Johnny after knowing her for an even less amount of time.  Then again, there is not exact formula for following God’s will, even if the film does not put it in such terms.  There have been marriages that lasted for decades when the couple only recently met, and others where husband and wife knew each for significantly longer and they are only together as spouses for days.  Once more, it comes down to discernment.  The Church has a process called “PreCana” where prospective husbands and wives spend time hashing out details that might seem trivial early in the relationship, but could mean the difference between a lasting relationship or divorce.  Clearly, Johnny and Julia did not do this, but seemingly neither does Linda.

Luckily, Holiday is a good movie, which helps me overlook its flaws.  Then again, I will see most anything in which Grant and Hepburn appear, and I have only one more of their flicks to view.  As such, this one is an unconditional recommendation.