Often, when something is broken, I will jokingly suggest fixing it by hitting it with a hammer.  I have been known to use this line for any issue.  Your computer not working?  Hit it with a hammer.  Having a bad day?  Hit it with a hammer.  Drop a fork in the kitchen garbage disposal?  I think you get the idea.  After watching Back in Action, I wonder if there is a hammer large enough for this cinematic problem.  Ironically enough, this is what the characters in the film do when presented with obstacles, but I will get to that in my synopsis.  In short, this Netflix action is not good, but somehow it brought Cameron Diaz out of a long acting hiatus?  I guess those hammers are not going to pay for themselves.

There are no hammers in the beginning of (or anywhere in) Back in Action, nor is it a movie about enthusiastic carpenters.  Instead, Emily (Cameron Diaz) and Matt (Jamie Foxx) are two Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) operatives preparing to head to a party, directed there by their handler, Chuck (Kyle Chandler).  They have come to some place in Europe to steal the Industrial Control Systems (ICS) “Key” from Balthazar Gor (Robert Besta).  Created by the former Polish intelligence officer turned Belarussian terrorist, the Key is a device that can unlock any infrastructure controlling program and cause a lot of problems of people around the world.  With some kicking and punching, Emily and Matt secure the MacGuffin and board a plane to head home, arranged by their British Military Intelligence, Section 6 (MI6), connection and one-time close acquaintance of Emily’s, Baron (Andrew Scott).  As they are in the air, Emily reveals that she is pregnant and Matt is the father.  The revelation comes just prior to the inevitable betrayal.  In the resulting fight, which brings done the aircraft in the mountains (Alps?), Emily and Matt pledge their love for each other by resolving to go into hiding to begin their family.  They presume that their government would come looking for the device and pin the disaster on them, so they resolve to leave behind the world of espionage.  Fifteen years pass and their marriage has produced two children and a stable life in the suburbs of Anywhere, USA.  With this comes the expected hassles of dealing with a teenage daughter, Alice (McKenna Roberts), and a son about to join his sister’s age group, Leo (Rylan Jackson).  The main hassle is between mother and daughter, with Emily trying to hold too tightly to Alice, who sees mom as being overbearing.  Alice may have a point when Emily locates the password to her daughter’s computer and starts reading texts.  Instead of studying with friends, Alice is at a club that is not supposed to allow in minors, and she is being served alcohol.  Emily and Matt go to retrieve their daughter, but for some reason a couple of the young men at the establishment take exception to these parental actions.  I would think anyone, regardless of generation, would see this as understandable behavior by a mother and father, but not these goofs.  Anyway, a tussle ensues that is recorded by people at the establishment.  Alice is shocked to witness her mom and dad handle themselves with their fists, but there are about to bigger problems.  The next morning after taking the kids to school, Emily and Matt are surprised to find Chuck ringing their doorbell.  Before their former boss can explain too much, Chuck is shot and Emily and Matt are, well, back in action.  Their first move is to evade those chasing them and get their kids out of school, believing Alice and Leo to be obvious targets for their pursuers.  On the way, knowing that it is the Key that their attackers want, Matt informs Emily that he had stashed it at Ginny Curtis’ (Glenn Close) house, Emily’s estranged mother, in England.  To Emily’s irritation, and Alice and Leo’s confusion, this means they all have to travel across the Atlantic to meet a woman mom had said was dead out of a desire for them to never again see each other.  Not long after landing in Heathrow and getting through customs, Baron and MI6 are alerted to Emily and Matt’s presence.  So, too, are Chuck and his goons, who is now working for Balthazar.  With some more action shenanigans, Emily and company make it to her ancestral palatial estate (because apparently this is how everyone in England lives), which is also a compound of sorts because Ginny, too, is a former MI6 agent.  She is also dating an MI6 aspirant, Nigel (Jamie Demetriou), who is a few decades her junior and is really there solely for comedic relief.  If there is anyone who could figure out where Emily and Matt might have gone, it is their old friend Chuck.  Despite Ginny’s security measures, Chuck shows up with several armed men, takes the Key, and kidnaps Alice and Leo.  Because Leo is the only twelve-year-old I have never seen with a sleep tracking ring, Emily and Matt are able to locate their offspring at the Tate Modern in London.  Here, Chuck double-crosses Balthazar and tries to sell the Key to the highest bidder.  To drive up the price, he has an assistant use it to shut off London’s power grid for a few moments, as well as lowering the Thames estuary barrier holding back flood waters from the English Channel.  While Baron’s people go after the Key, foiling its sale, Emily and Matt stay on Chuck, who has their children.  In arguably the silliest moment of the production, it is Nigel that gets to the Key and reactivates the barrier by smashing the keyboard with his fists.  Meanwhile, another chase ensues, ending on the river and with Chuck’s boat colliding with the re-raised Thames sea wall.  These events have made Emily and Matt cool once more in their children’s view, which is reflected in Alice inviting mom to watch a movie together.  Before any of this can happen, though, Emily and Matt are startled by Baron, who is in their back seat and suggesting that the mission is not over.

Thus, the implication at the end is that Emily and Matt will once again be Back in Action.  I am not sure this is warranted.  Then again, I am not in charge of spending Netflix’s money.  If I were, though still forced to make this movie, I would have added more ideals that fit with my Catholic Faith.  For example, Emily and Matt justify lying to their children for the past fifteen years as a measure of protection.  Granted, I have never been a spy, so I lack familiarity with the peculiarities of such situations.  Yet, Emily and Matt go so far as to say that their hiding of the truth makes them great parents.  The Church has some nuanced views on falsehoods, which you can look up for yourself in the Catechism’s treatment of the Ninth Commandment: thou shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.  In this and other places, to respond more directly to Emily and Matt’s assertion that their actions are right, Catholicism says that the ends do not justify the means.  Put in a less clichéd manner, this means that doing a little bad in order to bring about a good is not acceptable.  This is a pretty clear rule, though there are caveats.  In the Catechism in a Year podcast, Father Mike Schmitz discusses a hypothetical he had once heard of a family protecting Jews from the Holocaust.  If the Gestapo were to appear at the door asking if there are illegal people on the premises, would it not be the Christian duty of the sheltering family to tell the truth?  Father Mike interprets Church teaching to say that truth is owed to those who deserve it.  One who is in league with evil is not worthy of honesty because they are not themselves honest.  Those, keeping information from Nazis is no sin because they are complicit with devilish works.  The same thing cannot be said about Emily and Matt.  Of course, their lies are done and celebrated for comedic purposes.  Unfortunately, like the rest of the movie, it is not funny, though miss out on facing any consequences for their mistakes.

Still, I cannot say it is a mistake to watch Back in Action.  Sure, I did not laugh at all, and the special effects are pretty cheesy.  And despite me railing against their lies, Emily and Matt want to be good parents.  Those are ideas any Christian can support.  What keeps me from recommending this is that it is not too original, and the entire production feels rushed.  Pass.