If there is such a thing as middle age, it was invented by modern American culture.  Catholicism asks of its adherents to discern God’s will for each individual and stick to it.  Feelings and situations can change, of course.  We should never stop growing as individuals.  However, my Faith has a bigger word that can be seen as a sort of umbrella for pursuits like marriage, priesthood, or single life, and that is vocation.  It is the making of a promise, or the more religiously appropriate word “covenant,” between us and God that should not be easily broken.  In recent decades, though, our society has been increasingly divorced (yes, that was intentional) from anything permanent.  It is all about whatever we are feeling from moment to moment.  Again, it is good to pay attention to your feelings, but they should not distract you from your path.  Changeland (2019) speaks to these elements, though I will credit it for one key insight on which I will later expand.  The rest is a hodgepodge of poor decisions we justify in the immediate and usually come to regret.

The one thing that Brandon (Seth Green) seems to regret is his marriage to Vanessa (voiced by Rachel Bloom), and so it is off to Changeland.  Actually, the title is a play on words, which is supposed to be Thailand.  Brandon had booked a getaway to Southeast Asia with Vanessa, but in the past year he has come to learn to strongly suspect she is having an affair.  As such, without telling her about the trip, which is supposed to be a surprise anyway, he leaves incognito for the airport on the appointed morning.  For the first leg of the journey, he sits stoically, his face belying the betrayal on which he is dwelling.  Not even when he meets his best friend, photographer Dan (Breckin Meyer), in Dubai does his expression shift in appearance.  Dan’s attempts at cheering up Brandon go unheeded.  The journey is beginning to feel like a mistake to Brandon, particularly when they arrive at their hotel in Thailand and the person at the check-in desks believes the two men are the couple who had reserved the honeymoon suite.  Once they have the sleeping arrangements sorted into separate rooms and have eaten, the next morning they go for a tour around the nearby islands.  Their guide is Pen (Brenda Song), and she is assisted by her American friend Dory (Clare Grant).  Though it is obvious, Pen notes that Brandon is not having the best time and tries to convince him to participate more.  Meanwhile, Dan has temporarily given up on helping Brandon in order to hit on Dory.  Dory does not give Dan much, and they part company.  The following day, Brandon and Dan head for a different island where they have another excursion scheduled.  This one is operated by Ian (Macaulay Culkin), a fellow American.  Despite seeing the natural wonders of the surrounding area, Brandon remains sullen.  It does not help that they are joined by the newlywedded English couple, Emma (Rose Williams) and Marc (Kedar Williams-Stirling).  The loving attention they give to one another only makes Brandon painfully remember what he is missing.  After refusing to give into Dan’s playful peer pressure to jump off a cliff into the water, and feeling nothing at the so-called Enlightenment Falls, Brandon announces that he wants to go home.  Before they can do so, Dan convinces Brandon to go out one more time with him.  Reluctantly, Brandon agrees, and with Ian showing them the way, they end up at a reggae themed kickboxing bar.  Only in Thailand, I guess.  Brandon is his typical closed self until he meets Martin (Randy Orton), a gigantic man who Brandon initially thinks is there to beat him up.  Instead, Martin becomes one more person on this jaunt to perceive Brandon’s sadness and try to do something about it.  Then again, how do you refuse free drinks from a man that towers over you in height and muscle?  This helps to loosen Brandon up, but it is given a boost when him and Dan encounter Dory and Pen.  The women are at the same establishment looking to have a good time, and it turns out that Pen had been educated in Los Angeles.  Her playing the Thai local is something she does for tips, though she is from the area.  While Dan gives making moves on Dory another try, Brandon and Pen have their own conversation about Vanessa.  Unlike what the others have done, she listens.  It may not be the most ideal setting for such behavior, but it is Christ-like nonetheless.  It helps him know that everything is going to be okay, though he takes in a foolish direction when he steps into the ring with a Thai kickboxer, mistakenly believing he will have an easier time because they are hoping for tips.  After being knocked out, Pen brings him into a bathroom for some inappropriateness, while Dan and Dory find they have much in common.  Before the night ends, Martin shares one last private shot of alcohol, and Brandon and Dan return to their hotel.  The last thing we see is Brandon calling Vanessa, but the credits roll before we hear any of their conversation.

It would have been nice to get some resolution to Changeland since we spend much of it wondering if Brandon will resolve his marriage.  Given the things he does with Pen, it would be logical to assume that it does not go well.  What saddens me as a Catholic about this is that we are never given definitive proof that she is being unfaithful.  Brandon talks of suggestive emails and messages, we hear voicemails from Vanessa trying to excuse herself for another late night, but he does not say whether he caught her in the act.  These things are important because otherwise such feelings are mere speculation, and not useful in any marriage.  It is further complicated when he admits to having never confronted her as to the truth of what is going on with her.  The Church will annul a union between a husband and wife in cases of infidelity, but only when there has been some attempt to mend the situation.  In this respect, there is a line that Dan tells Brandon that speaks as to what should be done by either partner, regardless of who is the victim.  Dan tells his friend that it is pretty simple: Brandon either needs to fight for Vanessa or give up and move on with his life.  Brandon protests, claiming that it is not that easy.  Brandon is, of course, wrong.  God gives us free will to make such decisions.  This includes breaking His covenants, like marriage.  This is not recommended because of the seriousness of such promises and their potential consequences, but we are free to divorce a partner on a whim.  Yet, that is not what God wants of us.  He desires us to care enough to protest when a marriage goes wrong and to do something about it.  God fought for us in His Passion, and we can do the same in our own, smaller way.  Of course, there is the chance that things may still not work out as one hopes, but God will see the effort.

It is also not much of an effort to watch Changeland.  It does not get too crazy with drinking and other behaviors until the end.  I do not understand why people think the best way to unwind is act a fool, but again, this is why we have mid-life crises, sadly.  There are other reasons to watch the movie, if not simply for the stunning Thai scenery.