One of these days, I will run out of Sandra Bullock films to review.  However, she was not the only draw for today’s film, Two if by Sea (1996).  The other is Denis Leary, who also co-wrote the screenplay.  In the 1990s, Leary was a comedian who had a reputation for defying the establishment.  That appealed to me in my younger years.  Since I have grown in my Faith, I now see things differently.  In one of his comedy specials, he has a bit where he talks about not wanting to raise his children in the Church.  Because this is supposed to be funny, his main criticism was that he cannot trust a religion where one’s authority is based on the size of your hat.  That is absurd, of course, and so is this movie, to a certain degree.  Yet, it does have Bullock in it. . . .

In Two if by Sea, Bullock plays Roz, the girlfriend to Leary’s Francis “Frank” O’Brien.  They are travelling through New England having one of their many arguments.  As they bicker, they slowly notice that the police are catching up to them.  They are in a stolen car and are transporting a stolen painting.  It is supposed to be one last score before Frank retires from a life of crime, but he appears less than enthused about this prospect.  Another person not amused by these proceedings is Federal Bureau of Investigations (FBI) Agent O’Malley (Yaphet Kotto).  He has been called to the scene of the crime, and upon his arrival, becomes convinced that it is the work of “Phil the Shill,” a famous art thief who has eluded Agent O’Malley for some time.  As such, he is keen to nab this criminal despite everyone else telling him not to get involved.  Meanwhile, having escaped their pursuers, by car, train, and boat, Frank and Roz end up in an affluent Rhode Island town where they make themselves at home in a house that does not belong to them.  As they get settled, Frank calls Beano Callahan (Wayne Robson), the man responsible for setting the heist in motion.  Beano is not happy with the extra attention that Frank has garnered, not to mention that he and his associates will now have to drive down to Rhode Island for the meeting with the mysterious buyer.  It is not long after Frank and Roz are in their pilfered residence that they are visited by Evan Marsh (Stephen Dillane).  He is curious as to why there are people staying there when nobody is supposed to be there at this time of year.  Frank and Roz make up a plausible story that seems to convince Evan, and he quickly changes tack to invite them for a get together with some of the locals.  It is yet more trouble for the petty thieves, though it begins to become personal.  That night, Roz becomes angry with Frank when he admits that he is planning to do another job for Beano after this one despite promising to find other work.  As a result, he is kicked out of the room.  The party does not go much better.  For Frank, the urbane setting is not his typical milieu, his behavior is boorish, causing her to leave in a huff.  She is beginning to see him as little more than a two-bit hustler, while she is having her eyes opened to a wider world of art and culture.  As a result, she begins spending more time with Evan, which only raises Frank’s suspicions.  During this period, Frank’s companion becomes Todd (Jonathan Tucker), a teenager who lives nearby with a penchant for spying on the neighborhood.  Case in point, Todd shows Frank a tape peaking in on Evan as he is making out with a different woman.  As such, Todd suggests that Frank do something nice for Roz before a guy like Evan can take her away from Frank.  Managing to shoot a fish from a nearby stream, Frank cooks a dinner for Roz.  Yet, it turns sour when she brings out her painting, and he is less than enthusiastic about it.  It brings up all the current issues in their relationship, and added to them is his inability to share his feelings with her.  As a result, she decides to break up with him, though they still have one more day until Beano is due to come so they can collect their money.  At the same time, Evan declares his love for her, though she stops short their kiss citing the continuing feelings she has for Frank.  As for Beano and his associates, they have made their way to Rhode Island, but have been followed far too easily by Agent O’Malley, who knows the location for their proposed exchange.  As such, he and the local authorities are there to take Beano, Frank, and Roz into custody.  During their questioning, Frank tries to take all the blame for the plan on himself, which she appreciates.  Further, he recalls seeing a stolen painting in the video he had seen with Todd, the result of looking at the art books in their borrowed house.  With this information, Frank leads law enforcement to Evan’s home.  Though the initial pieces he points to are reproductions, he finds a hidden room with the originals.  In short, Evan is “Phil the Shill,” who further insults Roz.  Afterwards, all is forgiven, and I do mean all as Frank and Roz are set free with Frank getting an invite from Agent O’Malley to join the FBI as a consultant.

Despite being ordered to come to the office the next morning, at the end of Two if by Sea Frank and Roz are talking about what they are going to do in the immediate future and down the road.  I interpreted Agent O’Malley’s offer as legitimate, but in the next scene that does not appear to be the plan.  Either way, what Roz wants from Frank is commitment and stability, which are aspects of a relationship that should be worked on by both people, not just one or the other.  In Catholic marriage, the two people become one flesh.  However, since they are not married, this is a moot point.  Indeed, this is a rather thin film regarding what I can get out of it from a Catholic perspective, but it is that word “perspective” that caught my attention.  When Roz shows her painting to Frank, his gruff criticism is met with defensiveness.  At the same time, what she says is key.  She remarks that this is her vision for the building she put on canvas.  God does that with us.  The Creator of the cosmos takes His time with each individual, imbuing in them not only life but that which makes you and me unique.  I like to think that art is proof of this fact.  A student can copy another artist’s work, often with such exactness that it is difficult to tell them apart.  All the same, true art is something that comes from within, where God resides, and speaks to us on that level.  That is likely a little more serious than the movie aims for, but it works because art is part of the story.

In general, the story of Two if by Sea is a basic romantic comedy.  There is not much remarkable about it in that sense, and some of the jokes border on corny.  I enjoyed Bullock and Leary together, but you can see in them in better work.