When I was in high school, I was a nerd.  I like to think I was an athletic nerd, but a nerd nonetheless.  I always put my academics above anything else, but would play sports whenever I got the opportunity.  Regardless of my skill, I never socialized with popular crowds.  At that stage in your life, if you are not with that upper crust, so to speak, then you are a nerd.  A geek.  A dweeb.  I use such words because at that time, I did not know my worth as a child of God.  I see the same tendency in Dennis Cooverman (Paul Rust) in I Love You, Beth Cooper (2009).  It takes God to grow past these feelings of self-doubt.  Short of that, since Faith is a long way from this film, the hope is that you confront those negative thoughts.

At the beginning of I Love You, Beth Cooper (Hayden Panettiere), Dennis confronts those negative thoughts in the most socially awkward way: during his valedictorian speech at graduation.  Then again, Beth was not his only target.  He also called out the bullies and her boyfriend, Kevin (Shawn Roberts), and outed his best friend, Rich Munsch (Jack Carpenter), as being gay.  This move makes Dennis even less liked among his peers, though Rich takes it well enough.  Beth is also a little more gracious, telling Dennis that she thought his words were sweet.  Though he is wildly nervous as they converse, he manages to invite her to his party.  She says nothing, cocking an eyebrow as she walks away before Kevin roughs up Dennis.  With a timely intervention from the principal, Dennis and Rich make their escape back to Dennis’ place.  After some awful advice from Dennis’ parents, they await the arrival of other guests.  To their shock, Beth gets there with two of her friends.  Of course, it gets off to a pathetic start.  He tries to open a bottle of champaign, cutting his finger and giving himself a black eye with the cork.  Meanwhile, Rich brings out the condoms Dennis’ dad, Mr. Cooverman (Alan Ruck), had revealed are in his nightstand.  The so-called party is officially broken up, however, when Kevin manages to locate Beth and rides up to Dennis’ house in a Hummer blaring Richard Wagner’s “Ride of the Valkyries.”  Kevin bursts into the house with two of his goons and starts wrecking the place, but somehow Beth finds Dennis cute in this moment?  Should I mention that Dennis has a poster of Beth above his bed?  We find this out, as does Beth, when Dennis and Kevin fight in the former’s room.  Nonetheless, she intervenes, giving Dennis and Rich the window to run away, with her picking them up in her car.  As they try to survive her criminally terrible driving, their next juvenile delinquent act is to purchase beer despite not being of age.  She also claims that he is her little brother and that their dad beats him.  I wish I could say that the rest of the movie gets better.  Her method of obtaining the beverages is to make out with the clerk at the gas station.  Once they make it to a secluded campfire, and the others leave for a disastrous attempt at cow-tipping, Beth and Dennis get some time alone.  During their conversation, he tells her that she does not have to do what others expect her to, that she is worth more.  So, kudos for that sentiment, anyway.  The moment is just as quickly evaporated as they all get back into Beth’s car and she continues driving like a lunatic, hitting the Cooverman’s parked car.  Though David thinks he has to get out and face an inevitable lecture, Beth prevents him and they continue on to Valli Wooley’s (Marie Avgeropoulos) soiree.  Once there, Beth reverts to her popular girl ways, and David is again disappointed.  As he mopes around, he is confronted by Greg Saloga (Josh Emerson), the bully David had pointed out during his speech, suggesting that the behavior had been the result of sexual abuse.  I wish I could say this was a different kind of movie.  Despite my misgivings, Greg is thankful for David’s words, saying that they were true and wanting a hug.  I guess that is something?  When Beth and David finally find each other again, it is at the same time that Kevin is spotted making out with Valli.  Despite this, Kevin is about to beat David to a pulp.  This time, he is saved by Greg, but ultimately Beth intervenes by driving Kevin’s car into the living room, and they take off in the same vehicle.  At this point, David is panicking, saying he is not having any fun, and Beth proclaims that they are not supposed to be having fun.  Sigh.  They end up at the high school, getting in because Beth has a key, where the girls invite David and Rich into the showers.  David is hesitant, but his decision is made for him when Kevin and his thugs show up.  It takes Richard and a wet towel to spring the others, which turns into arguably the goofiest moment in the movie, which is saying a lot: a towel duel between Kevin and Richard.  From there, they head to a private cabin in the woods where they have more drinks.  Beth and David go out to the dock to watch the sunrise, while Rich stays with the other two girls to do . . . things.  Meanwhile, on the dock Beth thinks her life is over, having piqued in high school, but David builds her back up, it ending in a kiss.  This concludes the evening plus, with Beth taking David home.  For whatever reason, she is thankful for their adventures, saying that they will marry if they are still single at their reunion.

Have you ever had a person make a similar pact with you as the one made by Beth and David at the end of I Love You, Beth Cooper?  I have, and for better or worse, they have not been fulfilled.  It is just as well.  Judging by the awfulness of this movie, I am not sure these kinds of deals are a good idea.  All the same, one of the lessons David learns from spending time with Beth is that she does not meet the ideal he had held of her throughout high school.  Having expectations of others is not a Christ-like way of treating people, no matter how much you claim to love them.  It is not how God sees us, either.  He views us through the lens of a love we can never understand.  Put in a different light, He will never think of us as worthless.  He gives us His grace without cost, which, oddly enough, is alluded to in the film. Throughout the proceedings, David remains convinced that Rich is a homosexual, a rumor he is at pains to refute despite his behavior.  When they sneak into the school and go into the girl’s locker room, David tells Rich that the latter has nothing to prove.  The statement is true for Richard, but it is even more true in regards to God.  There is nothing we have to do, or can do, to earn His love.  He gives it whether we are breaking traffic laws or pledging our undying devotion to an insane person.  Oddly enough, this is somewhat similar to how David feels about Beth.  She talks a lot about how guys want to be with her for superficial reasons, while he wants more of a relationship.  God desires a relationship with you, and you need not do anything dramatic, or dumb, to experience it.

On thing I would ask that you not experience is I Love You, Beth Cooper.  It is horrible in terms of its content and predictability.  Hooray for the underdog getting to kiss the popular girl.  Boo for the rest.