Because I am such a huge fan of Downton Abbey (2010-2015), it was a little hard for me to watch Fackham Hall (2025).  You will see why the comparison is an apt one in my synopsis, particularly if you are aware of the hit British series of which the latter is spoofing.  That Fackham Hall is a spoof is part of the reason why it hurt a little seeing it.  One could make the argument that I am loyal to a fault, though I take it as a credit to my Faith.  God wants all of our hearts, not half measures.  The fault lies in putting that same depth of feeling into certain things of the world, though as I have matured, I have tried to narrow the list of those deserving of such fanaticism.  Downton Abbey is good, therefore it occupies a special place in my heart.  As such, something like Fackham Hall that pokes fun at it hurts a little.  Admittedly, I chuckled in places, but it is also highly inappropriate in others, making this review mixed.

You may be mixed up by Fackham Hall’s beginning, especially if you do not know Downton Abbey.  I suppose the best place to start is at Fackham Hall itself, which is where the movie commences.  It is described through narration by Rose Davenport (Hayley Mills), in whose family the massive estate has been in for four centuries.  By the way, the narrator is an older version of our heroine (Thomasin McKenzie), who in 1931 is considered to be a dried-up spinster at twenty-three.  These are not my words, but those of her parents, Humphrey (Damian Lewis) and Prudence (Katherine Waterston), Lord and Lady Davenport.  They also say this as Rose is sitting next to them in the library, so hopefully that will give you an idea of the kind of film being discussed.  What is also being discussed is their other daughter’s, Poppy Davenport (Emma Laird), upcoming marriage to her first cousin, Archibald Davenport (Tom Felton).  The nuptials are supposed to save the eponymous manor and allow the family to remain as they have always been throughout the years.  Of course, the fact that Archibald is so closely related is intended as a gag.  All the same, she jilts him at the altar in favor of Lionel Gritt (Alexander Butler), the local manure collector.  Meanwhile, in London, the stereotypical street urchin, Eric Noone (Ben Radcliffe), is asked to quit his thievery for a simple assignment given by the nuns who had raised him.  More about this later.  With a quid in his pocket, Eric is tasked with handing a letter to Humphrey and an admonishment not to steal anymore.  Along the way, Eric spots Rose driving a car down a one lane country road, going in the opposite direction.  Their instant attraction leads to her hitting him with her car, wrecking Eric’s bicycle, but miraculously leaving him unhurt.  They depart with a warm shake of the hand, thinking they will never again see one another.  He is not aware of her position, and he goes through the servants’ entrance thinking to find someone who can take him to Humphrey for the delivery.  Instead, Eric is mistaken by the butler, Cyril (Tim McMullan), as an applicant for hall boy.  Eric joins the staff during a busy time and is immediately promoted to champaign duties as the wedding guests are all still there for some kind of celebration.  It is in this vein that Eric and Rose notice one another once more, and a romance is sparked.  As is to be expected, the matter is kept under wraps given their divergent social standing.  However, the topic of the Davenport’s fate hangs in the balance, and Prudence begins pressuring Rose to marry Archibald.  She has no desire to wed someone she has little regard for, unlike how she feels about Eric.  With the demands on Rose increasing, Rose sneaks out one night with Eric to visit a pub.  On the way back, they are observed by Mrs. Edna MacAllister (Anna Maxwell Martin), the head housekeeper.  She watches them as they head to the barn and have the proverbial roll in the hay.  The next morning, Humphrey is found dead in his study.  The person called upon to investigate the crime is Inspector Watt (Tom Goodman-Hill), who is a knock off of the famous literary detective Hercule Poirot.  By the way, if you pronounce “Watt” like “What,” you will have heard many of the jokes used about him.  Inspector Watt determines that everyone must stay until he figures out the crime.  For Eric, he senses the need to get away with Rose before the situation becomes impossible.  He had also taken money from Humphrey’s desk, which Eric intends to use to elope with Rose.  Before they can get far, Inspector Watt stops them.  They are then taken back to the estate where Eric is accused of killing Humphrey.  Instead of letting Rose sully her name by giving Eric’s alibi, he takes the blame and goes to jail.  It is only after sitting in a cell for a while that Eric realizes he still has the letter for Humphrey.  Opening it, it indicates that Eric is actually Nathaniel Davenport, the rightful heir, and the one who should be doing the marrying.  Using a spoon to tunnel out of prison, he must make it to the church before Rose says “I do” to Archibald.  Just outside the doors, he is stopped by Mrs. MacAllister.  She is trying to prevent Eric from being with Rose because of her secret affair with Humphrey.  Mrs. MacAllister had also been the one to accidentally kill Humphrey, several times in one go as it happens.  With that, Eric’s name is cleared and he can properly wed Rose.

It feels a little strange to use the word “proper” in connection with Fackham Hall.  It is stranger yet to note all the Catholic references in it.  What is less strange are the stereotypes it has about priests touching boys and promiscuous nuns.  Those tropes are one of like four things people think they know about Catholicism.  On a more serious note, it was great to see Eric kneel before the Crucifix and ask for forgiveness of his sins.  Still, the presence of such Catholic imagery proves a longstanding theory of mine, one that goes back to my dissertation: filmmakers use Catholicism when they want to signal Christianity without getting specific.  I find this fascinating, despite the comedic material, when you consider the longstanding anti-Catholicism of England.  Indeed, one of the subplots in Downton Abbey is the edition of the Catholic Tom Branson (Allen Leech) to the residents of that stately home.  Tom was also the chauffeur, making Eric the obvious analog in Fackham Hall.  It also helps that Eric is Catholic.  How do I know this?  The fact that he is raised in an orphanage run by nuns helps.  At the same time, the Church is not known for turning away anyone regardless of their religion.  Instead, it is the scene before the Crucifix that clinches it.  Only Catholicism uses such items as a way of seeking God.  Granted, he is making such entreaties not so much for religious purposes, but because he is hoping for Divine assistance with Rose.  It makes the relationship with God transactional.  Nonetheless, He does appreciate us coming to Him with our needs.

What is less needed is some of the crude humor in Fackham Hall.  Indeed, it is the only thing that is preventing me from fulling recommending it.  To spare you the trouble, I will give the briefest encapsulation of what this movie is: it is Downton Abbey meets Naked Gun.