As I write this review of The Big Sick (2017), I have playing on my television a YouTube video of a walk-through of a Chicago neighborhood.  Unfortunately, it is the Gold Coast, so it does not pass any Catholic Churches, though the Archbishop’s house is on North Boulevard.  I bring this up to underscore once more just how much I love the city.  I have said it before, and I will say it again: any film that is set in the Chi draws me in like a moth to a flame.  That is certainly the case with today’s movie.  Its poster makes this fact clear.  Sadly, it was not filmed in Chicago.  I had my suspicions based on the kind of pizza eaten, but my subsequent research confirmed it.  Regardless, I enjoyed the story immensely, and I hope you will as well.

What Kumail Nanjiani (as himself) enjoys in The Big Sick is doing stand-up comedy.  During his set one night, he gets a “woo” from Emily Gardner (Zoe Kazan).  They make eyes at one another and after he is finished, they get to chatting.  Their interaction leads back to his place where they do the kinds of things the Church teaches against before marriage.  I may be fighting a losing battle here, but God appreciates the effort.  At any rate, they each try to deny an interest in having a long-term relationship.  For her, she is trying to focus on getting her graduate degree in psychology.  We also learn that she had once been married, so she is cautious about dating.  For him, while he does not speak about this with his friends, it is his Pakistani heritage that gives him pause.  Throughout the first half of the movie, whenever he gets a chance between driving for Uber and doing a show, he is at his parents’ house for dinner.  Without fail during these meals there is a knock at the door.  His mother, Sharmeen Nanjiani (Zenobia Shroff), always answers and brings in a woman Kumail is supposed to marry.  It is part of the Pakastani culture that the parents arrange a marriage for their children.  They did this for his brother, Naveed Nanjiani (Adeel Akhtar), who comes for these same dinners with his wife whom he met under similar circumstances.  Kumail is uninterested in following these rules.  Further, we see that he does not pray.  What he is also not doing is telling his parents about how he feels.  They think that he is just being difficult, and that he will eventually give up the jokes and become a lawyer as they hope.  Meanwhile, in spite of them having other intentions, Emily and Kumail see an increasing amount of one another.  The hiccups come when she expresses her heart to him for the first time.  Though she does not use the word love, his reaction is not the greatest.  It gets worse when she mentions that her parents are going to be in town and suggests that they meet.  When he balks at the idea, she also figures out that he has yet to tell his parents about her.  Naveed is aware of her, but he thinks Kumail is making a mistake.  The final insult for her comes when, back at his apartment, she finds the box of pictures of all the women Sharmeen has introduced to Kumail.  His feeble attempt at explaining the practice of arranged marriages does not go well.  Emily’s final question is whether he sees a future for them, and he does not give a definitive answer.  He tries to carry on with his comedy, and dating, but one night he gets a call from her roommate saying that Emily had to go to the hospital.  The roommate had to leave, so Kumail goes to keep Emily company.  His presence is not received warmly, but it becomes a moot point when her health suddenly takes a dramatic turn for the worse.  The doctor all but forces him to pretend he is her husband so that they can intubate her and put her into an induced coma.  Kumail is also stuck with the unenviable task of calling Emily’s parents to let them know what is happening.  Because Emily tells her mother, Beth Gardner (Holly Hunter), everything going on in the young woman’s life, mom is a bit rude to Kumail.  Regardless, he sticks around for a while, even coming back after his next show.  That persistence softens their attitude towards him, and it is Emily’s father, Terry Gardner (Ray Romano), who accepts Kumail’s invitation to drive them to Emily’s place.  They spend some more time together, and Kumail reluctantly invites them to one of his gigs.  In truth, he had been supposed to go to dinner with his family, but Terry’s eagerness to see Kumail perform has them going to the club.  Indeed, when a heckler interrupts Kumail’s set with racist remarks, Beth goes after the person, almost getting in a fight.  However, Beth is not improving.  At one point, they think she is going to be released soon, but her infection spreads.  Further, Kumail’s parents come to his apartment wondering where he has been and why he spurned one of the women they had arranged for him.  It is at this point that he finally admits that he does not want such a marriage, and that he is not serious about being a Muslim.  They leave, outraged.  With all this going on, he blows his audition for a major comedy show in Montreal.  Not long thereafter, he gets a text from Terry telling him to come to the hospital.  The doctors have finally stopped the infection and figured out what he been ailing Emily.  She is now awake, but she has no desire to see Kumail.  Once her drug-induced loopy-ness wears off, she remains firm in this stance despite his best efforts.  At the same time, two of his friends from stand-up ask him to move to New York with them.  Kumail accepts, but not before trying to make amends with his family.  They are lukewarm to the prospect, but Emily does come to say thank you for all he did.  The last scene is of him performing in New York with Emily in the crowd.

There is a lot of performing in The Big Sick, and not all of it takes place on a stage.  One of the takeaways from the film is that relationships are a performance.  This pertains to Emily and Kumail, as well as everyone else with which they interact.  It is especially true between Kumail and his parents.  They expect one thing of him, and he wants another.  Perhaps I am being too harsh.  After all, “performance” suggests lying, and Kumail does not do that with everyone.  The same cannot be said for his dealings with his parents.  Though they are Muslim, they are not the only religion that preaches honesty and honoring those blessed to have been the ones to have brought you into the world.  The Ten Commandments have something to say on these matters, specifically the fifth and ninth commandments.  Christianity also preaches repentance, and this is something you also see in the movie.  In fleshing out this point, it is good to talk about how Kumail gets to this point.  Not telling the truth to his parents, or Emily initially, is a sign of immaturity.  He believes that he will lose their love, and he is not wrong to have that fear.  People are imperfect, and we feel hurts deeply.  In our broken natures, we also believe that honesty can be hurtful, which is true, too.  At the same time, we have to be true to whatever it is that God is calling us to, regardless of what others (including our loved ones) might think.  One does not have to be blunt or untactful in relating these things, but it is better to just tell them instead of doing what Kumail does.  The best way of putting that is when his parents ask whether he believes in God (Allah), and he says he is not sure.  He then adds that he has to figure it out for himself.  There is wisdom in this statement.  This Lent, I have been following the Pray40: The Return challenge on Hallow.  It has been focused on the parable of the prodigal son, who has to do the same thing.  One can see echoes of this in the film, which is clinched when it is Kumail’s father, Azmat Nanjiani (Anupam Kher), who sees his son off to New York.  It is not a perfect reunion like in the parable, but it works.

And that is the best thing to say about The Big Sick, that it works.  There are some moments of sexual suggestiveness, but no nudity.  It is of the sadly commonplace promiscuity that makes this movie less than perfect.  Still, it gets my recommendation.