My first job after turning sixteen-years-old was working as a bagger for Albertson’s.  After a few years, I moved into another department.  Calling it a promotion would be laughable as I had no control over any of my fellow employees.  What I did oversee was the renting of movies, which was still predominantly of the video home system (VHS) variety.  I recall today’s film, Home Fries (1998), sitting on the shelves, long unviewed by anyone.  I never understood why until today.  This Catholic is pleased with its slightly pro-life message, but the rest is tonally bizarre, as I am sure will become evident from the following synopsis.

What is evident for Sally Jackson (Drew Barrymore) at the beginning of Home Fries is that her lover, Henry Lever (Chris Ellis), is a liar.  He comes to her drive through window at the Burger-Matic to tell her that he is leaving his wife, Beatrice Lever (Catherine O’Hara).  The dishonesty comes from the fact that until he had found out that Sally is pregnant, she had been unaware of his marriage.  Further, Sally threatens to inform Beatrice of the affair, particularly the child, before telling Henry to leave.  While driving down the road, he is met by a Cobra attack helicopter.  Further, he does not know that it is being flown by his stepsons, Angus (Jake Busey) and Dorian Montier (Luke Wilson).  In a panic, Henry swerves his car off the road, gets out, and pants severely as he runs trying to find shelter.  Out of breath, he sits down and is face-to-face with the instrument of his torture.  He does not move as they apparently open fire, and indeed has remained unmoved after dying of a heart attack when the police find his body the next morning.  This is because Angus and Dorian had shot blanks, though Dorian had been against the idea.  Despite collecting all the shell casings, Angus believes they must take further measures to ensure no one knows what they have done.  This means making a visit to the Burger-Matic because as they had been hovering in front of Henry, interference from Sally’s headset had come over their radio.  Upon returning home to their mother, who feigns being distraught when hearing about Henry’s death, she gives them the go ahead to take care of any loose ends.  At the same time, she claims that she did not say to murder Henry.  All the same, Dorian worries that Angus means to kill Sally, though he is not thrilled by the so-called plan to learn what the Burger-Matic employees know.  According to Angus, his brother is more of the people person, so it is Dorian who must get a job at the fast-food restaurant.  He fills out an application on the day that Sally has learned of Henry’s passing.  While she does not mourn his death specifically, she is worried about who will be the father for her baby.  Their brief interaction softens Dorian’s opinion of her, and makes his new, lowly position a little more palatable.  Indeed, the more they are around each other, the more he becomes attracted to her, even buying a toy for her child.  He also endears himself to her father, Red Jackson (Lanny Flaherty), though in the strangest way possible.  Red drunkenly holds up the Burger-Matic in the middle of his youngest son’s birthday party, causing the soldier that is Dorian to react and thwart any further illegal activity.  Upon coming to pick up Dorian from his shift, Angus believes that the police presence means something has gone wrong for the brothers.  Dorian reassures Angus repeatedly that nothing is going on.  Further, Dorian says that he has no new information from the Burger-Matic staff.  This is also where the movie begins to fall apart.  The goal is to find out who it was that had overheard them on radio.  It appears that Sally is the obvious one when they visit the establishment the next morning.  However, for the next roughly half hour, it is presented as a secret Dorian is trying to protect due to his growing feelings for Sally.  Those feelings are given a boost when he attends a Lamaze class with her.  Doing so, though, leads to him being late for Henry’s wake, which upsets Angus and Beatrice.  Dorian makes it to the funeral the next morning, but has to cover for Sally when she shows up at the cemetery, but stays at a distance.  Thus, the next time they spend time with one another, he asks questions about her baby’s father, even though he knows the truth.  For the first time, she tells the story about Henry.  Dorian is about to admit his relation to Henry when she talks about pictures her lover had taken.  They are innocent pictures of the affair, and she indicates they are in his office at the cigarette factory.  I guess I should mention this is a poor Southern town, but we are all God’s children.  Because Beatrice has discussed wanting to do terrible things to the person with whom Henry cheated (even though she apparently despised her late husband), Dorian rushes to get the pictures before Angus.  Dorian is successful, but he forgets about the negatives.  Upon developing them, Angus and Beatrice feel betrayed that Dorian would be fraternizing with Sally.  Speaking of Sally, she picks this moment to try to meet with Beatrice.  This is how Sally learns of Dorian’s connection, and she departs hurt before the others know of her presence.  This has all become too much for Dorian, who tries to call the police.  Before any information is given, Angus tackles Dorian and locks his brother in a closet.  Upon freeing himself, he rushes to Sally’s house thinking a tragedy is about to occur.  Everyone is stunned by his behavior until Angus shows up in the Cobra.  With Beatrice along for the ride and Sally going into labor, Dorian tries to escape in a truck.  What prevents murder is Dorian reminding Angus of their love for one another as family.  This allows Dorian to get Sally to the hospital for the birth, and this is where the film concludes.

I am glad that Sally is forgiving at the end of Home Fries and is willing to have Dorian in the room after the baby is born.  What I do not understand is why nobody has come to arrest him by this point.  He had been involved in several crimes, but the lack of incarceration is part of the nonsensical nature of the film.  The movie even speaks to its absurdity when one of the lines in it says that one should not hold their breath waiting for understanding.  As silly as this might also sound, there is a Christian equivalent to this sentiment.  One of the things that defeats so many people on their spiritual journey when it comes to having a relationship with God is their inability to grasp what He is doing in their lives.  This can be said for Sally, who claims that she had been brought up right despite the unplanned pregnancy.  Obviously, she had been manipulated by a man, which is sad.  Any one of us in a similar situation might ask God why this happened to us.  When we do not get the answer we want, we turn away from His love.  We do so because it does not feel the way we think it should, which is our human frailty to want to understand fully the Divine plan for everything.  Instead, Faith calls us to let go of that desire.  A key to this mystery can be found in Sally’s baby.  Once again, I have to credit her for deciding to go ahead with the pregnancy when Henry had tried to convince her to get an abortion.  For Sally to explain to anyone why she would do this when it would bring nothing but complications could be difficult.  The easy path would be to terminate the baby’s life.  What we do not know, and can never know, is what that child could turn out to be.  Still, this is more human thinking.  Instead, see that baby as God does, a beloved child of God, and the rest does not matter.

It also does not matter to me whether you see Home Fries.  If nothing else, I was impressed by the cast, despite the material with which they had to work.  Ultimately, the problem is that this is supposed to be a comedy, and it is more about murder.  That is not a recipe for comedy.