When I was a child, Scooby-Doo, Where Are You! (1969-1970, 1978) was as popular as any other animated series.  Though it was off the air before I was born, the re-runs were a part of the regular broadcast rotation that parents used in the 1980s in order to keep their children occupied.  If memory serves correctly, some of the strongest connections I have to watching it were when I stayed home sick from Catholic school.  I may have missed a day of parochial education, but there was a comfort in the hijinks of Mystery Inc. as they unraveled another puzzling tale with their trademark goofiness.  With all this nostalgia, you might think I was there opening night back in 2002 when a live-action, feature length Scooby-Doo film premiered.  I do not remember the specifics as to why I avoided it, but I think this synopsis might provide some clues, pun intended.

If you remember those old episodes of Scooby-Doo, then you will know that it starts in a manner reminiscent of the cartoon episodes.  “Start” is probably the wrong word because it appears that all the clues have been uncovered and Mystery Inc. is trying to capture the floating clown ghost in a toy factory in order to reveal his true identity.  Once they have Old Man Smithers (Nicholas Hope), Velma Dinkley (Linda Cardellini) explains the scientific process behind how he floated through the air.  In short, it is another case solved for a group that is well known for such feats.  However, not everything is fine between them.  As usual, Fred Jones (Freddie Prinze Jr.) is out front, taking credit for the plan that had led to the uncovering of the villain.  The real brains had been Velma, and she is tired of being overlooked, saying that she is quitting.  Not wanting to be overshadowed, the person who is always in trouble, Daphne Blake (Sarah Michelle Gellar), tells them that she is going off on her own.  To spite them all, Fred says the same thing.  The only ones trying to keep the peace are Shaggy Rogers (Matthew Lillard) and the title pooch (voiced by Neil Fanning), who makes himself known through canine growls that are heavy on the “r’s.”  With everyone going their separate ways, Scooby and Shaggy take their van, the Mystery Machine, and head for paradise where they can apparently eat until their heart is content.  This is their only real goal, and yes, this Catholic will call it gluttony.  It is as they are in their van parked near a beach cooking burgers that they are found by a representative of Emile Mondavarious (Rowan Atkinson).  Emile owns Spooky Island, an amusement park and resort that he wants Scooby and Shaggy to come to in order to investigate strange happenings.  Shaggy firmly says they do not do this sort of thing anymore, but when an all you can eat buffet is mentioned, they change their minds.  Upon getting to the airport, they notice that the others have all received the same invitation.  Also, how do you get a massive dog unto a plane?  You dress Scooby up like a grandmother.  It looks as if everyone is accepting the disguise, but Shaggy is about to have a new distraction: Mary Jane (Isla Fisher).  I am guessing there is innuendo meant with that name, but the movie is rated PG.  It is all meant to separate the former friends, which continues once they arrive on the island.  There to greet them is Emile, who explains that guests arrive like them, but leave as conformist robots who are suspiciously strong.  Each of them, despite Shaggy’s suggestion that they work together, say they immediately have clues they want to follow.  By the way, there is a voodoo angle to this, which Daphne learns from a priest (Miguel A. Nuñez Jr.) of the religion, who warns her not to go into the creepy castle at the top of the mountain.  She entices Scooby and Shaggy to go with her, but Fred and Velma end up there as well.  As is standard in these stories, there are strange eyes peering at them from behind the walls, the owners of which activate the defunct ride and almost gets Scooby and the rest killed.  In the chaos, Daphne locates the MacGuffin, which is a hand-sized pyramid that conveniently looks important.  Meanwhile, Fred and Velma stumble unto a training video that looks like it is intended as brainwashing.  They are forced to escape when goons show up, and they make it back to the hotel.  There, Daphne gets a little tipsy while trying to decipher the runes on the object, while Fred is angry with Scooby for interrupting the time he is spending with Mary.  The pooch does so because there are monsters that eventually break into the lobby and belch green smoke into anyone on whom they can get their claws.  Mary, Scooby, and Shaggy escape, with Mary using her phone to call the coast guard.  It turns out the authorities are part of the evil plan, too, and everyone on the island but them have been made into mind-controlled zombies, except for Scooby and Shaggy.  These two end up underground where they find a vat of souls, from which they are able to extract their friends.  From there, they hatch their plan to release everyone, which, of course, goes completely off the rails.  Despite the scatter-shot nature of their approach, they quickly find that Emile is behind everything, technically.  I mean that literally as the park owner is actually a robot controlled by Scrappy-Doo (Scott Innes), Scooby’s estranged nephew.  Not wanting to deal with Scrappy’s relentless energy, a while back they left the pup on the side of the road.  Now, Scrappy is trying to take over the world as revenge because, why not?  Scooby’s “pure soul” is needed to make Scrappy into a mega-monster, but Mystery Inc.’s combined efforts save the day.

Once the proverbial day is saved at the end of Scooby-Doo, there is a press conference like in the first fifteen minutes.  This time, though, Fred insists on giving the credit to Velma, but she talks about it being a team effort.  They are all happy with this assessment, so I guess we can call that growth.  Believe me, this movie is terrible, and it has not aged well.  The computer-generated images (CGI) are bad even by 2002 standards.  That being said, if there is anything a Catholic can glean from the film, it is that the characters learn some valuable lessons.  That is also a generic spiritual reaction, and one that you can get from many other pieces of cinema.  A more specific Catholic response would be the satisfaction I got when the line is said that ghosts are not real.  The Church does not follow popular thinking regarding the souls of the deceased haunting the living.  If there is such a thing, it is nothing good.  While the film walks back this statement with the vat of floating heads, it should be underscored that these people are not dead.  Beyond these points, what should be emphasized more is that voodoo is also bad.  What this Catholic will not do is denigrate those that practice it by saying it is not a religion.  And actually, this movie is more disrespectful towards voodoo since it makes a farce out of it.  Catholicism warns against voodoo because it involves powers that are beyond human understanding.  There is communicating with forces and spirits that could be in league with evil.  I am trying to be as kind as possible, but if these things are more powerful than ourselves, then we automatically do not control them, much less understand them.  Again, today’s entry is even worse, but we see what meddling in these powers can do.  It is not good.  What is best is leaving all such things to God’s providence.

I would also leave off watching Scooby-Doo.  It is not necessarily because of the voodoo aspect that I make this recommendation, though that is bad, too.  Instead, it is more because of the terrible CGI and silliness.  To put it different, this is not these are not the cartoons you remember.