There is a bit from The Benny Hill Show (1955-1989, roughly) where there is a purposeful attempt to make the worst film possible.  Sets are constantly falling, the camera is never positioned where it should be, and the actors and actresses deliver their lines in the most ridiculous way, among other issues.  It is hilarious, even if I would not recommend many aspects of the program.  While watching In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (2007), henceforth just In the Name of the King, I thought early and often about that skit from the British comedy variety broadcast.  Very little makes sense, and it cannot even get its religion correct.  At one point God is mentioned, but then there is also discussed the existence of other gods.  Adding to this problematic twist for a practicing Catholic is the widespread use of magic.  I am guessing they were hoping to capitalize on the fame of that Catholic tale, The Lord of the Rings, but they failed on every conceivable level.

What the evil wizard Gallian (Ray Liotta) is failing to do in the opening shot of In the Name of the King is to fully seduce Muriella (Leelee Sobieski).  She is the daughter of the mage named Merick (John Rhys-Davies), who is outside somewhere observing Gallian’s moves, for some reason.  I guess they are not “those” moves, but rather the Krug army Gallian is building.  But, enough of that, let us move to somewhere else in this kingdom where we meet Farmer (Jason Statham), who does literally what his name says, along with his wife, Solana (Claire Forlani), and son, Zeph (Colin Ford).  As they are harvesting their rutabagas, they are visited by their longtime friend and former soldier, Norick (Ron Perlman).  As they sit down for a meal, Norick proposes that they join King Konreid’s (Burt Reynolds) army.  Farmer refuses, preferring to stay on his land.  This commitment to agriculture extends to making Solana and Zeph take their crop to market while he carries on the work at home.  Remember those Krug?  Well, they start trouble, first on Farmer’s plot, and then in town where Solana and Zeph are visiting her parents.  Once Farmer and Norick have taken care of the beastly horde near them, they rush to where they see smoke.  It is Solana that rings the bell, warning of the approaching Krug, and she is eventually captured for her efforts.  It had been to her that Farmer had initially run, but he sees the tower in flames and switches to saving Zeph.  Unfortunately, with Gallian personally manipulating one of his minions, he murders the boy before Farmer’s arrival.  Not long thereafter, King Konreid’s forces arrive, but too late as the Krug have retreated.  The citizens are unhappy, but the monarch has his own problems.  Interspersed to this point are scenes of palace intrigue, mainly with Duke Fallow (Matthew Lillard), the ruler’s nephew and heir.  Duke Fallow is in league with Gallian, hoping to speed up his ascension.  Upon King Konreid’s return, Gallian manages to slip poison into the monarch’s food, even though Duke Fallow partakes.  Gallian is able to provide an antidote to Duke Fallow, but it takes Merick’s intervention to prolong King Konreid’s life.  Still, the magician says the ruler does not have long to live . . . for some reason.  With the scheme in motion, Duke Fallow takes a large portion of the army and marches to join with the Krug.  King Konreid could use all the troops he can muster, but for the moment, Farmer is not one of them.  Instead, the agriculturalist is trying to catch up with the Krug army, along with his brother-in-law, Bastian (Will Sanderson), and Norick.  When they do find them, they try to sneak into the enemy camp by disguising themselves.  The attempt is laughable and they are discovered before they can affect Solana’s rescue.  Bastian and Norick are taken prisoner, while Gallian is once again mind controlling a Krug to hang Farmer.  He manages to slip the noose before dying, but is unconscious for a while before Merick finds him.  The sorcerer implores Farmer to join the king’s cause, saying it is the best way to save Solana.  Getting back to the king, he is feeling well enough to lead his forces against Duke Fallow and the Krug.  When the two sides meet, there is a pregame conference during which the mutineering legions switch back to their rightful leader.  The king is also joined by Farmer, who is in the thick of a gratuitously long battle scene.  In the midst of it, Duke Fallow manages to mortally wound King Konreid with an arrow.  In the aftermath, as King Konreid is dying, he summons Farmer, who actually turns out to be Camden Konreid, the long-lost son and true heir to the throne.  This revelation comes out as Commander Tarish (Brian White) is dueling Duke Fallow to avenge their ruler.  Still, there is more to do, unfortunately.  Giving direction of the army to Commander Tarish, Camden, Merick, and Muriella venture to Gallian’s volcano-side lair to confront the dark wizard personally.  As they approach, Bastian, Norick, and Solana unsuccessfully attempt a jail break, with Norick dying in the process.  Gallian takes hold of Solana because she is pregnant with Camden’s son, which is mysteriously important.  It is Merick who is the first to fight Gallian, but the older mage dies in the bout.  Before breathing his last, he gives his power to Muriella.  She uses it to help finally defeat Gallian, which also means the end of the Krug.

That is literally the end of In the Name of the King.  There is no prologue.  The fighting stops and the credits roll.  If, while reading all the big names in the synopsis, you were amazed like me that they would be in such a stinker, then you are not alone.  Then again, the money had to have been helpful.  I do not want to sound too critical because it would not be the Christian thing for me to do.  There are, thankfully, a few lines to which I can apply a Catholic analysis.  For example, Merick tries to reason with Gallian before their duel, which is always good to do when approaching such situations.  God does not desire the death of His loved ones, even if it inevitably happens.  When someone is in the wrong, every opportunity should be given to let them make the necessary changes.  In Matthew 18:21-22, Jesus is asked by His disciples how many times they should forgive those who wrong them.  Our Savior’s reply is that it should be limitless.  If you have that in your heart, and the other person still opts for evil, then they will receive what they have chosen.  What makes it worse for Gallian is when he makes the statement that he is beyond mercy.  It is not true, but with his death, again, he gets what he chooses.  It is also said before this happens that one cannot reason with evil.  I am not sure this applies to Gallian because it is mentioned that he used to be friends with Merick.  That implies good, and so long as that exists, God can do anything.

Sadly, it does not appear that God wanted to do anything about In the Name of the King.  What I have described to you is my best attempt at making sense of what happened.  Indeed, my synopsis does a better job of laying out the plot than the movie.  That should tell you everything you need to know about the film.