The last thing one could call me is an expert on weddings, though I have been in my share of them.  What I have not done is plan one, and this is why I was perplexed by Rachel Getting Married (2008).  Before continuing, it should be noted that the film is not really about the ceremony, although all the events surrounding it provide the backdrop.  I will get into the plot in a moment, and it is a solid, if testing one.  If I have any experience with nuptials, it is from a Catholic perspective.  Here, we get almost every idea anyone has ever had to celebrate two people getting hitched, and they are all given a moment to participate in the story.  The result is atmospheric and engaging, but I kept wondering what was coming next.  If you have read any of my reviews, you will know the answer to that question for this treatment.

Speaking of treatment, before Rachel Getting Married we see Kym Buchman (Anne Hathaway) leaving the rehabilitation center in which she has been living for the past several months.  She is the sister of the title character, Rachel Buchman (Rosemarie DeWitt), and Kym has to get a special pass to attend the wedding.  The reason for all this is doled out in drips and drabs throughout, but I am going to tell it all now for context’s sake.  With what I have already said about Kym, it should be no shock that she is an addict.  She has been in and out of facilities a few times, but her disease has been present since she was a teenager.  One contributing factor is her parent’s broken marriage, but making matters worse is the role she played in the death of her little brother, Ethan (not pictured).  To go to the ceremony, one thing Kym must do is take part in Alcoholic Anonymous (AA) meetings and provide urine samples.  During one of these gatherings, we hear about how, when she was sixteen, she had gotten high on Percocet and driven off a bridge with Ethan in the car seat.  She had been unable to free him and he drowned.  Although everyone had supposedly moved on from the incident, it is more difficult for the person who had been at the wheel.  Regardless, her dad, Paul Buchman (Bill Irwin), and the bride-to-be are welcoming of the family member whom they have not seen in some time.  Kym does her best to get in line with everything happening, but tensions soon arise.  First, it is the color of the saris being worn by the bride’s maids.  Next, and more importantly, is the fact that she is being passed over for Maid of Honor.  When confronted, Rachel tries to claim that she did not know if Kym would attend, but enough of a fuss is made that Rachel grudgingly gives the title to Kym.  Then there is the rehearsal dinner.  For a while, I thought of something I had seen at Catholic pre-wedding celebrations when we honor the person of the moment with a series of speeches.  I guess that is what is happening here, but I doubt they saw it that way.  Whatever it is that is taking place, Kym becomes increasingly anxious as she is seemingly being delayed from taking her turn to talk.  Upon getting the microphone, she goes into some detail with her struggles with substance abuse before issuing a blanket apology and saying a couple nice things to the couple.  Rachel is not happy when they get home and is quick to voice her opinion.  However, the brewing argument is stymied when she announces that she is pregnant, something that overjoys everyone present and wrongfoots Kym.  The next day, it is clear that Rachel is still angry about the situation, but they go to the stylist together despite the tenseness.  While Kym is getting her hair colored, a man who had been in treatment with her recognizes her.  Coming up to her, he thanks her for her testimony, which had been a set of lies she had told for the sake of the group therapy.  This would not be as big a problem had she not made up a story about Rachel being anorexic and the two of them being sexually abused by an uncle.  Rachel overhears him relating this and leaves the salon in anger, abandoning Kym.  Upon Kym returning, she protests that nobody understands her, and that they all still blame her for Ethan’s death.  While everyone is reeling, Kym decides to visit their mother, Abby Buchman (Debra Winger), who has come into town for the wedding.  At length, Kym asks why Abby had left her daughter with Ethan, knowing that the young woman was an addict.  Abby’s feeble response is that Kym was always at her best when she was with her brother.  This is not enough, and Kym repeats the question.  It soon devolves into violence, with Abby striking her daughter in the face, and Kym returning the blow.  Distraught, Kym drives away sobbing.  Coming to a fork in a wooded road, she decides to go straight through it and is only brought to a stop when the car hits a boulder.  She is found by the police in the morning and is eventually dropped off at her dad’s house.  Even though she has a black eye and a busted lip, she is determined to fulfill her Maid of Honor duties.  It is upon seeing Rachel that the sisters finally break down and reconcile, with her bathing Kym.  During the celebration, Kym is present, but her ability to participate flags as the evening continues.  It is a lot, so I cannot blame her.  The main thing is that she wants a moment to reconcile with her mom, but it passes and Abby leaves with her current husband.  Nonetheless, Kym returns to her facility at the end thankful for the experience.

It is quite the experience watching Rachel Getting Married, if for no other reason than seeing all the things that happen during this wedding.  There is the Indian style ceremony, followed by the backyard barbecue, interspersed with folk, jazz, and reggae music.  There are also drumlines and Brazilian samba dancers.  Whatever it is that is happening, the focus of all these tidbits is supposed to be the newlyweds.  This is part of the problem for Kym because an addict believes that everything is about them.  Now, I have talked about addiction in other reviews, mainly focusing on the aspects of their steps that pertain to Faith.  After all, one of the steps is admitting that there is a higher power and that you are not in control.  They use the generic “higher power” term instead of God because the program is supposed to be for people of any religion.  Because I am Catholic, I have always taken this as an affirmation of God’s existence, and this is key for anyone to truly grow spiritually speaking.  It is with this aspect, though, that Kym has the most problem.  Because she cannot forgive herself for what happened with Ethan, she is unwilling to accept the existence of a God who could do so for her.  That is painful, but I have seen it in other addicts, my mother included.  This is tragic because an essential aspect of Christianity is God’s power to forgive all our transgression.  We are made new by His love, literally and figuratively.  In many respects, this is the goal of the twelve-step program.  We can never return to a time when we were without sin, nor can we erase what we have done.  Again, this is something only God can do.  However, by accepting, learning, and moving on, we can do better.  Once more, it is love that makes it possible.  Because this movie is like so many others in not crediting God for any of this, we get a fair proximation when Kym and Rachel reconcile.  It is the turning point of the film, and it makes a noticeable difference.  It is made more complete by inviting God into such moments.

Indeed, Rachel Getting Married is full of such touching moments, bad and good.  As I hinted at a moment ago, they are better when we accept God’s presence in them.  It is in the background of this movie, but He is obscured by the myriad of wedding activities.  Still, this is solid movie that gets a recommendation.